I had to tell off a junior two times, followed by the same advice as reflected in the above saying, last week. I find it very dificult to say "No", especially to a proposal that seemd "on paper" to be positive and "doing good for a group or community".
However, in this particular case, the proposer was dragging his feet far too many times in the "implementation" phase after several other members of the group had done their fair share of preparatory work. I was the "senior" approached to lead the initiative, and my "writing and public relations" skills were used on many occasions to "advance the porposal".
It had to come -- after a series of letdowns, the proposer upsetting a group project because of his evasiveness.
Because someone has NOT been telling things as it is. In fact, it was outright leading people up the garden path. Until an outsider did us a BIG "Favour" -- helping to let the cat out of the bag!
So to this junior, it was a firm "No", given reluctantly, not once, but twice! But after much rumination and discussion with the "interested" parties over several "heavy" days.
These "interested" parties also felt strongly the time has come to put the foot down.
So "high noon" would come within a few days when an ultimatum has to be met. Otherwise, it's arriving at a big crossraods for several of us -- and maybe we would be taking different paths. For better or worse. We'll see.
Meanwhile, I guess I leave these words with my "well-meaning" partners:
Cowardice asks the question - is it safe? Expediency asks the question - is it politic? Vanity asks the question - is it popular? But conscience asks the question - is it right? And there comes a time when one must take a position that is neither safe, nor politic, nor popular; but one must take it BECAUSE it is right.- Dr. Martin Luther King
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