Yesterday Desiderata and a Fashionista caught up again for some light banter about Da Desi Code -- she encountered IT the first time when the OUR I-LAND ChallengiA was sent out to select the name for our Idealistic Island in The Sun. I guess she must have become slightly addicted to IT, and with the recent worldwide interest in Dan Brown's controversy Da Vinci Code (hyped UP by the media plus a Hollywood movie cashing in to boot, or isit bootleg, Petaling Street stylo? Malaysians have taught the world wella in bringing out the best COPY ever. You name IT, we have IT -- Rolex watches, Gucci bags, Poison perfumes, and Viagra, no problem, blue or orange colour, Sir/Ma'am?-- Chee Cheong Kai in Chinatown has IT!
Alain Delon shoes? FashionAsia has IT -- THE ORI!
I have an artwork, an ORI by YAO DIXIONG, well nigh the "Sunflower" by Vincent Van Gogh -- any offer starting at RM20million. We can adjourn to our
spirite
D
estination...NO?
But this morning's INTER:LUDE is about something less heart-warming. In fact, it's depressing. A TRAUMATIC EXPERIENCE for the story-taeler, @fashionasia.blogspot.com.
The fff Tale comes courtesy -- with a curtsey too -- of a Fashionista who is quite a contrarian -- a li'l like Desi, going against the one-way traffic -- that's why we are both in demand overseas, from Milan, to Nice, to London and of course, the fashion capital of the worlde, Gay Paree, where FashionAsia has just returned with an attire she says will look goode on Desi, provided I use some 4-inch high heels, not twisted.
So unwinding the reels,
here we go with Desi's virginal attempt at script-writHing, using FashionAsia's ORI as Guinea-piggy-Back, with Desi taking some liberties using Poetic Licence, but I have stuck to the ORI 95%, the other 5% being Touch-up, Make-Up and adding some Accessories ... you know, the fashion walk. FashionAsia luckily does not hold a PL -- butt she has got Hollywood-Milan-Paris Diplomate of Internasionale FAshione and Actione, whihc is one class higher than PL:
CREDITS ROCK&ROLL:
Narrator: FashionAsia
Da Direktor/Assasinator: YL Chong
Producer & Financing Company: FashionAsia
Wardrobe: KonKoFAshions
Tuesday, April 04, 2006
My Account of Being a Snatch Thief Victim
PROLOGUE, Fade in to Present:
FASHIONASIA holding Newspaper, The People's Paper masthead clearly evident:
Today I read theStar online, staring wide-eyed at the article about the murder of the Struddels Cafe manager(Bangsar) just to rob a mere RM4000 ringgit.
Is life worth only 4k? Blardy hell, life is so cheap nowadays.
(Murmurs to herself, but withing Desi's sharp-eyed hearing...)
The story is disheartening.
It pretty much ruins my day.
I was meaning to share my story as a snatch theif victim for quite a while now but I haven't done so due to its length. But today, I just needed to let it out. I need to share my story. It's a traumatic experience but I know many women out there experienced the same. Some have their story heard, some kept it secret. But all of us are left traumatized, some scared, and most definitely living life in fear.
Act 1, Scene 1:
I remember it clearly, it was a couple of days after my birthday. Back in 2003. Mom gave me a pair of slip-on Alain Delon working shoes that I craved for on my birthday.I kept them in the boot of my car.
It was a regular work day. I woke up, dressed up for work and decided to wear my new shoes. As I walked out of the gate, there was this Indian man on his bike making stops at the neighbours asking if they would like to have their grass mowed. Then he came to me and asked the same, I said no thanks. He then proceeded to the other neighbour. As he was leaving, I walked to the boot of my car which was parked outside the gate to change my shoes, my handbag sling on my right arm.
While I was putting on one shoe, the Indian Man make a u-turn (GO-STAN) on his bike and came towards my direction. He stopped the bike in front of me (my back was facing him) and rushed up to grab my handbag.
At that point of time, I was shocked beyond words and my brain froze. I just acted on reflex. While he was pulling, I hung on to my bag and refused to let go. Lord knows why I was so stubborn! I've always thought to myself if anything like this ever happens to me, that I will never put on a struggle but to just let go and let him have the bag. But when it actually happens!
I FORGOT to let go! *rolls eyes*
As I am a pretty (and) strong person, he proceeded to hit me on the head, probably wanted to knock me off. I suspected he had used some metal of sort as the pound was hard (we later recovered a round metal thingy). I put on a struggle for at least a minute or so fighting with all my might...but alas, as a weaker gender he managed to push me to the floor. Blardy bastard! (ProFUNity inserted by The Director) He sped off on the bike and I tried to chase him togged in one shoe and barefoot on the other... He manage to speed off.
Act 1, Scene 2:
The highlight of it all was that, all the time I was screaming on top of my lungs for a good 5 minutes or more. Albeit I wasn't able to conjure words but mere screaching and screaming...I thought that by screaming hysterically for a good 5 minutes would as least get the neighbours coming with broomsticks and parangs. Boy! was I wrong. Disappointed to the core I was.
Blardy hell! (Inserted again by Da Direktor)The next door neighbour WAS THERE. The opposite neighbour WAS THERE. The neighbour a few doors away WAS THERE TOO. All they did was staying within their compound DOING NOTHING! The opposite neighbour, an uncle just shouted "Hoi! hoi!", thats all.
Luckily, one old aunty a few doors away, jotted down the bike number and gave it to me later. The best part is, another aunty next door DARED to tell us later that she was THERE ALL THE TIME WATCHING THE WHOLE ACT, and...get this..."Waiting to see if he comes any close to my daughter's car, if he touch the car i would wack him!", showing her broom in hand.
I quote her exact words.
NOW HOW GOOD IS THAT FOR A NEIGHBOUR huh?! Arrggh! BRAVO you Malaysians, KL/PJ people sucks!
Act 1, Scene 3:
Ptuiiiii!!! If this happened to me back in my kampung, the whole neighbourhood would have come out and put up a fight with the bad guy. And i'm staying at a considerably posh area on PJ mind you. City people sucks. Fullstop.
Defeated, but more so disappointed.
*clap clap* Thank you for your support neighbours. Very good semangat kejiranan you all have. Thank you for coming out and gathering by the streets all of you! The entire row of neighours miraculously appeared out of nowhere just after the bike sped off. They only came out to console me AFTER the bugger LEFT. I couldnt even look at their faces without feeling disgusted. NOBODY HELPED ME AT ALL when i was beaten up. !@23@^#^#%T@!!!(Da Direcktor interprets this as some Swear Words like F..K which would be censored out anyway...so the symbols remain-lah.)
I returned home dazed, with a trobbing pain on my head due to the bashing.
:
:
(Crew adjourns to Chee Jong Kai, Chinatown, for Dinner/Supper and absorb the Atmosphere as possible location shooting in future.)
:
:
POETIC JUSTICE: MY GOD IS POWDERFOOL!
Act 2, Scene 1:
As I sat dazed on my couch, i whispered a silent prayer: That justice be served. That's all i asked for.
Then I called the office to take the day off and proceeded to the nearest police station to make my report.
To my suprise, while I was at the police station there was this other girl there -- reporting of a snatch theft too. Sad but true, I am not the only victim for the day. The other girl got it worse, she was visibly bruised. I suppose she fell and hurt herself.
While I was writing my essay...(gosh we still use pen and paper! Where is the computer?!) I was told to wait a while before i leave as the police had picked up a report of a suspect.
True enough, after about an hour or so, the police brought back the Indian chap handcuffed, together with my handbag! *fewwfeeettt*! (Whoaaa!...My prayer so powderful. I must have murnmured loudly as the mata-mata all turned their eyes on me. Or is this my imagination? (Added by Da Direktor to depict state of elation, not erection because the victim is Female, not Mail... Don pray pray, I murmured, more softly this time...)
Act 2, Scene 2:
It seems that because this Indian fella was in such a hurry, he drove like mad to this kampung area...there was where he met with an accident! (Wakakakakak! padan muka!) I heard that: He bang on a car that belong to a Malay guy. Soooooooooo, the Malay guy demanded him to pay-up!
The Indian fella scared shitless due to this taiko like Malay chap who knows some kampung gangster ...that called up his brothers and cornered him. So,Indian fella took out MY purse and used MY money to pay for the damages!
Haha...the hawk-eyed Malay guy saw how come he was having a ladies handbag - GUCCI brand summore! - and purse -- again, Alain Delon! - and saw my IC. He sensed something wrong and questioned the blardy Indian fellow, to which he replied that it belongs to his sister. (Haha...hallo.. I'm so many tones lighter than your shade leh! I smirked to meself.)
SOooooo..., this was when the Malay chap -- my hero my WIRA! No, not Proton! (inserted by Da Direcktor to support OUR NATIONAL CAR...) --who with his great presence of mind, called up the police to come arrest him. Waliaoeh!!! So terror. SOooooooo the Indian fella was thrown into lock-up after I identified him. He was strip naked and whacked kau kau by the police officer.
(Suggestion to add this point by Da Direcktor to make event comtemporary, BUTT is over-ruled by the Protagonist... -- Though I'm civic-conscious, I think this time around, police can whack the buttock hard, hard, a bit, a bit...)
THE END.
(SADdest TWO WORDS in Da Direktor's script-writing vocabulary -- blardy hell, again out of a job!)
Narrator (cheong hei wan, insists on ending thus despite Da Direktor shouting CUT! CUT!)
The moral of the story is that: My story does have a good ending after all. But not everyone is as lucky as I am. Some have their hands slashed and have permenant scars and all. It's very nasty.
Oh and btw, my handbag and my purse and all my belongings ARE STILL WITH THE POLICE TO HOL(e)D AS EVIDENCE. I didn't get to take them back. The case was delayed umpteeen times and we never went to trial as yet. For 3 years now. Boohoo...too bad I'm not Siti Nurhaliza lo...Or Nicole Kidman...(Name added oninsistence by Da Direktor jest to get even!).
I can make one complaint and have a trial the next day if I am Siti Nurhaliza.
Immediately if I am Nicole ...FADE OUT finally...
EPILOGUE: I know some of my ER will be thinking aloud what the blardy hell the ffb stands for in the Post's Title?
I can read your minds clearly, mGf, so I'm explaining this even without your asking: ffb is Fresh fruit bunches OR Fucking Freaking Bastards, when put through the crusher, they come through as palm oil OR Putrid Onnay-onnay.
PS by FashionistA: To my Malay chap Hero. If you EVER read this post. Please contact me! In my dazy state I forgot to get your name or your contact. I haven't gotten a chance to repay you. Really thank you from the bottom of my heart. I owe you one. So they say "Hutang emas boleh dibayar, hutang budi dibawa mati".(Direct UN-Nicole Kid-certified translation: Money owed can always be repaid but if you owe a favor, you bring it to your coffin.)
PPS by DESIDERATA: The first time I indulged in some swear words, at Desi's Place was in the spirit of pro-FUN-unity. In a way it was done as a Third Party reference so I could blame in all on Young&Articulate Chris.
Chris the "speaker" and story-teller in Mark Haddon's Incident of the Dog in the Nightime ... Yan knows very wella the Chris I'm talking about because she too has one Y&A aspiring to be a Lawyer-and-meanw'ile-diverted-by-the-Nurse-in-the-ward!:)
Then the second time -- truly bad occasion that I couldn't hold myself back! -- was recounting Kyels's traumatic experience as another SNATCH THEFT VICTIM.
She injured herself trying to fend off two "bastards" snatching off an "invaluable" bag from her as it contained an equipment borrowed from a friend. Yes, reflex action often spurs one to protect one's "belongings" -- especially a precious item borrowed from a sincere buddy...(Read about it first-person at kyels.com...Yeah, I agree with her:
"Oh, shit those Fuckers!"
Sumtimes a fowl word or two is aloud, yes? And that, definitely, is a rhetorical Q!
I am sure everyone of us would have similar experiences to recount --happening to ourselves, family members, friends. Just over the recent CNY period, my nephews had their house "burgled" -- second incident in two CNY breaks! -- and their father "losing" his Proton car parked right outside their house.
Luckily mGf Kyels suffered only superficial, temporary injuries. But the sense of being "terrorised" . Yes, terrorism comes in the form of having your sense of safety compromised -- especially in places like your own residential neighbourhood. Since some 10 years back, Desi has been telling friends -- especially young teenage girsl, also older women too -- that it's no more safe to venture out alone!
With millions of "aliens" roaming our country, I wonder whether the authorities have not been using the "ISA" on the right targets? My dear EsteemedReaders, please tell me!
18 comments:
It seems the situation back home is getting worse?
When I was in Paris 01/01/06, my friend and I were sleeping on the train. Another friend of ours was wide awake, but the youngster snatched her bag and ran off at a stop just before our destination. My friend screamed and we both woke up but no one in the train moved a limb or even battle an eyelid.
3 of us just stared at each other until the doors of the train shut. My friend did the right thing of not chasing after the thief coz we're only 3 girls in the middle of the night at an unknown area. She lost all her tourist-y belongings including her passport.
Hence, no nice trip even though I love the eclairs, the amore feeling and finally watched the famous moolah red (euro94 + one free champagne; the cancan nothing special. If Nicole Kidme inside, I'll pay triple also cansurecan!)
Summary: crime is everywhere!
In case u missed the hilarious newsbite in our local nonewnewsspaper, our polis are too busy doing other charitable stuff like donating hamper goodies to fat little boys undergoing weight-loss programmes in hospitals.
I laughed so hard I nearly burst my seams when the same poor fat little boy went to the papers and accused polis of sabotaging his efforts to lose weight after regaining 8lbs eating the polis hamper goodies of canned soft drinks, chocolates & sweets back home!!
THeels:
Wonder if my ER remember the Gomen leaders took offence when a senior minister from Sin-lang said parts of Malaysia looked like Wilde, Wilde West Cunytree...? We're getting there -- did I 'ear someOne
whsiper: WE Are O'lady There!
Sorry to 'ear about that Paree ouuch-ting, Theels, hope you people Be Vely CARREfool when backpacking rite! Learn some french from Howsy, and you'll be Right (as contrasted with LEFTist Desicca...) THAT GUY (biologist PhD in the waking!) is having FUN-d in the most XXpensive city in Da Worlde right now as I writHe.
On your sext trip to Gay Paree, pls pass my "swAlk" to Nicole Kid, jest make sureCANcunGals like MiMI knot around!
Agreed with your SunMerri: crime is everywhere, just don maketh it Amore in NegaraKu!
Hugs and Kisses for 4mins59secs at the most Can-can!:)
Make peAce, not woe!
anak merdeka:
I would NOT have miss'd the newsbyte IF only you had turned up for the Besta toast bread + 3 portions of Hainan KaYa I ate on your beHalf, also on THeels beHave.
Lust night I was working OT -- loading a FAshionshowENJOY-cum-stealNUTSOJOYfool!
Fat boy -- unkind term to use cos in my schooldaes I was quite propsperous-loking2!, butt those daes the Polis did not visit me with Hamper, lucky they did not come for Me with a Hammer! Lols, we Bloggers so knotti wan, always running UP the officers-out-of-low!
So when r u showing UP at Haridoes?
Yu recognise Dessica weAring 4-inch bollowed HiHeels! Watch out! Ketch Desi ...Ooops, soly ma'am, I fella on your Kambing soap!
Dear ER:
Sorry to "spoil" your Easter Sundae, but just Take Note this type of "crime" will become a sort of permanent feature on our landscape. Please Exercise More Care:
Page 10, Sunday Star:
"Sunday April 16, 2006
Robbers kill snooker centre owner
KUALA LUMPUR: A part-owner of a snooker centre who thought he could fight off two armed robbers at his outlet, paid with his life.
Lee Chee Kong, 37, from Salak South, died after he was shot in the abdomen when a gunman and his accomplice, brandishing an automatic pistol and an axe, stormed into the premises in Desa Petaling yesterday.
In the 3.45am incident, the armed robbers, wearing T-shirts and shorts, demanded that Lee hand over the cash.
When Lee refused, a scuffle broke out, leaving him wounded in the abdomen.
The men grabbed RM500 from the cash register and fled.
Four customers who were at the snooker centre at the time, saw the armed robbers entering a grey Proton Perdana with an accomplice waiting inside, before speeding off.
Lee’s manager and colleagues rushed him to the Universiti Malaya Medical Centre (UMMC) but he died two hours later.
City CID chief Senior Asst Comm II Datuk Karn Kam Peng who confirmed the incident, urged anyone with information to contact the Rakan COP hotline at 03-2115 9999, SMS to 32728 or to contact the nearest police station.
Meanwhile, quick thinking by a photo shop owner saved her from being extorted by a Tenaga Nasional Bhd (TNB) imposter in Jalan Datuk Haji Harun.
The owner, known as Sally, told the man who produced a TNB identity card bearing his photograph, that she would have to contact her husband for the money.
She instead called Cheras MP Tan Kok Wai who informed the police after checking with TNB that the man was not a member of their staff.
Police arrived and nabbed the man.
Cheras OCPD Asst Comm Hasnan Hassan said the man was not a TNB staff but a freelance wireman.
“We have detained him for further investigations,” he said. ~~~~~~~
PS: Maybe it's good to visualise such a scenario possibly hAPpening to you
-- would you react REFLEX-like like FashionAsia did?
Think carefully -- because it can mean Lifre & Death with a wrong move.
My 3sen worth is guided by the Motto:
Money can be earned, so sacrifice that -- comapred with:
Life is precious, Once Scarred or even Aborted,
Can Never Be Recovered.
Thank SAFETY.
God Bless Every Step We Take.
I:
S:
A: men.
dear desi,
thanks for the kopi&paste[ry]
i enjoyed the litelime...;>
Hahaha. A hamper not a hammer. Yeah, the other day surfing at The Star, I read that article too. Betapa lucunya!
I learnt a bit of beginner's French. Good enough for asking directions, taking orders and guessing out the meaning between lines. Howsy went to Oslo? That place is great for skiing!
Paris was a bit of an ouch but I learnt well not to sleep in a train, where to sit in a train and what to do when one's passport is lost. More wise tips from travelling, an ouch gives better preparation next time!
Talking about fake viagra, today I saw some (made in China) in Penang's Chowrasta market. Comes in packs of four. They were being sold by an Ah Pek; wonder whether he uses them. That, BTW, reminds me of newsreports in Seremban where China girls were selling the same stuffs, and if a potential buyer shows interest, they would quickly offer themselves as 'test specimens', with additional charge of course.
Crime in the city will continue to burgeon. This is the prize of city poverty and failure to have an effective system of enforcement as the enforcers are busy cari makan and looking for those holding hands, hugs and kisses.
fAshionistA:
Your think there IS steal such a thing as a Flee lunch eh?
For this PRO-fessional job, wait till you get Da Bill!
Meanw'ile, no teh-C for thee,
Jest Limau-BerSIN-ar!:)
twisted heels:
I'm in hAPpy mood thios morn
Tho it be Mondae blue-biru
Pak Lah wants all BAD cops sent to pasture
Hey, THeels, can arsk Scottie Yard any Green Green Grass of HomeawayfromHome there?
These runaway cops can do UK a servis, I'm sure!:)
fishtail:
Can ye buy first one container load
and we BOTH set up stall at Chee Cheong Kai?
I'll shout: BUY, Bye, and ye shoot
the blue pills into their mouth?
Bandaraya comethe, we give free sample
If femail Opiser, we also do her a Kiss-Kiss
And pass on the Orange one chic-to-chic!
PS: Hey, don do IT in FuRong wan
People will whisper: THat sunOFAgan!
mave sm:
I think you spe-I-Ak from personAL Xperience, rite?
Were you there demo the KISS&show?
Were you the chicky one having a peck at WHO? MP cili PAddy!
You carryon, yo-ho-ho!
I have the Stop Watch...
*4mins 52secs...SE7EN more to go!
(That RUMAHSs follows Indon example: MAX is 5mins of Kissing Lips-to-Lips in pubic...)
morning desi,
recently i was talking to someone in my neighborhood. I was told that 1 day when her sister in-law came visiting. There was a guy that came after her with a PARANG!! YES PARANG!!!! wanted her to surrender her car. They manage to flee with her carkeys but the car they didnt manage to take as her brother (owner of the house) came out shouting at them and they got scared.
sigh.... and where was the security guard?? they are paying like 300 dollars per year for the guard and they were nowhere to be seen.
Snatch thiefs or whatever thieves... should be held accountable for their action 100%. Period. No blame or finger pointing should be directed to the ordinary bystanders. They looked on. So what? What u expect them to do?? Unless u have a good action director (John Woo)? Jacky Chan?? Jet Li?? Then let the fight between the ppl of light and darkness begin. The fast car chase, the explosion when the bike hit the Petro nanas oil tank.....Booom!
Any chance legalizing firearms to everyone? Then we can shootout at OK corral.... Ordinary rakyat run to high ground and proceed to take out the fledging snatch-thief with one shot. (right at the back) How's that?
BTW, Interested in breaking Da LinPeh Code?? Please proceed to Lin Peh blog.
BTW, did anyone do anything when millions are snatched from our Piggy bank in the name of building Sim (sin) City.... right before our eyes?? We all look, we all bitch, we all hide, we all do the same thing again every half decade.
FAshionistA:
Yes, as Theels reports from lundun or paree or whatever EU kapital she's at now: crime occurs everywhere.
Let's now focus on improving the situation.
Let's coopetrate wit' Pak Lah, a decent, GOD-fearing man who can't go IT alone.
May I urge my ER now to DETOUR TO
petitiononline.com -- every signature counts!
Like what sisdar Helen says: Did we stand up at the key moment,
as ConcernedCitizenJoe/Jane,
and Let Our Voices COUNT?
God Bless Us in Our Wisdom,
p
e
A
c
e!
I:
S:
A: men.
Helen: can I reserve my RESPONSE to your current comments (2! at 1 go! -- You're very productive after 'MIA' for 10 daes?) -- I believe IT deserves serious rumination, and discourse, and debate, ala THOREAU - "I may disagree with what you say but I will defend, to the death,your right to say IT."
p
e
A
c
e!
I.S.A:min.
PS: I'll definItely visit limpeh's CODE. That's right UP my terrortry. CH(j)eerz!:)
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