My Anthem

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Socialists can be Sexy too!

OR should IT read as Tool? You, my democratic ER, decide!
As our Most Esteemed PM says, and he's no socilaist, this is a democratic country, a citizen can say anything he/she likes, and that includes an ex-PM and private citizen Desi.

mGf Howsy always swims across the English/French Channel for his haiti (I prefer this plural form to hiatuses for HIATUS, a common pastime of Bloggers:). Now I can spy some RATionale; besides Mimi and Nicole, here's another hiddden gem~~~

French
socialist a
sexy belle


LONDON: Segolene Royal, the
French Left's main presidential candidate,
has been voted the world's sixth
sexiest woamn, beating sciores of international
sex symbols including Jennifer Lopez,
Elizabeth Hurley and Penelope Cruz.

The surprise victory in a survey on the
"100 sexiest women in the world 2006"
for the men's monthly magazine FHM
out today is being hailed as a boost
to Royal's chances of winning French
presidential elections next year.

The 52-year-old mother of four was
only two places behind Angeline Jolie.

Top of the poll was Adriana Karembeu, the
French-Slovak super-model and wife of
former international French footballer
Christian Karembeu.

Royal, the girlfirend of Socialist Party
leader Francois Hollande, has taken the
French political world by storm since the
beginning of tghhe year, going from a
relative unknown to the favourite in next
year's presidential election, even garnering
more support than Nicolas Sarkozy, the
Right's frontrunner.

She can now claim to be the first politician
to have featured on FHM's annual list.

Part of Royal's success, suggested Le Parisien,
which leaked details of the poll, conducted by
the CSA polling institute, is down to a
Hillary Clinton-style overhaul she has
undergone in recent years, going from
bespectacled academic to designer-clothed,
high-heeled, glossy-haired presidential
contender.
~~ Telegraph Group Ltd, London

DESIDERATA: FAShionAsia, can thou do an "overhaul" of
Desi-da Socialist, in anticipation of a surprise
Presidential poll in NegaraKu?


DESIDERATA, an avowed Socialits for S'X days a week, is most times as sexy as a Royal:); BUT DON"T CATCH ME ON A SUNDAE -- I'M AS TOADY AS FRENCH TOAST ON DA CAPITALIST EGG!:(

A second light-hearted ala carte Oz footbrawl, also known as Rugby~~~
played in fromer closed door Commie state~~~

Rugby game
mistaken
for brawl


MOSCOW: Russians playing a
game of amateur rugby were
arrested by opolice who mistook
the match for a mass brawl, local
media reported yesterday.

"We got a call to our control
room saying there was a fight
involving a lot of people on some
waste ground just outside town,"
RIA news agency quoted a police
official in the southern city of
Rostov-on-Don as saying.


The players and supporters --
nearly 100 people -- were taken to
the local police station. They were
freed when officers realised they
had been playing rugby.
-- Reuters


mGf Yan from Nashville nigh Catsville reported recently a "pretty conundrum" that only a cowgal could have gotten out of niftily.
If there is no such word, take IT from Desi IT means something akin
to "doing a Rabbit out of a amgician's glove". Mayhaps a cowboy does IT badder:)~~~

Da Cowgal of yantouch.wordpress.com relates:

"Famous Lines


Also three years ago, I was attending a TOT (get it, it is Train The Trainers, the two "Ts" have nothing to do with Tension here) session on a program called "No Apologies" teaching teens on sex, love and life. To be direct, the message of the program is "abstinence until marriage is the best and healthiest sexual decision for children, teenagers and young adults".

There was "Tension" because I could not find someone to babysit Chris (my son, who was then 7 years old). So, I decided that I brought him along. Though 7, Chris was very disciplined (He still is anyway). He did his homework while the aunties (all women, Girls' Brigade project) enjoyed some famous lines. Read on …

Boy - If you love me, you'd let me.

Girl - If you love me, you won't be asking me

Boy - Don't you want to show me that you love me?

Girl - I don't have to have sex to show you that I love you.

Boy - It's safe - I have a condom

(Interruption)

Chris - Mummy what is condom?

Oop! The facilitator looked at me, and said, "You settle it yourself."

Chris - Mummy, what is it?

The facilitator continued, ignoring Chris. Mummy was thinking …

Girl - You want me to bet my future on that piece of rubber?

Smart!

Mummy - It's a piece of rubber.

The "Tension" gone. Chris went back to his homework. Women went back to learn the famous lines.

The piece of rubber


Three years later, it was last week.
I had just secured the account of that rubber thing. I was vetting the visuals and text of the advertisements on my home PC. The creative company has been creative in the text, and waiting for an OK to go ahead.

Overlooking my shoulder to the computer screen, Rachel (15-year-old daughter who has just been drilled in the "No Apologies" program) said, "Mummy, you are buying condom?"

"No, it's advertisement, I want to make sure it is OK for publication."

Chris, now 10, said, "Condom? The rubber thing you said last time? What's that for by the way?"

He remembers. He has been wondering.

"It's used by married couples if they do not want to have baby." Mummy hopes to close the issue as soon as possible.

Tension still on …

Perhaps this would end the tension, still on "famous lines":

Boy - I thought this relationship was going somewhere.

Girl - If somewhere is Sex, then think about going somewhere else.

Boy - But we should celebrate our love.

Girl - GREAT! Pick me up at 7 with roses and we'll go out for dinner. I need to be home by 9. You can join me and my mummy and daddy to watch England Vs Paraguay in the opening …

Butt TENSION's still on, Dr Mahathir does not watch 22 craxy men chasing after one stewpid ball...


Desi Da Cowboi offers a possible alternative getaway for the Pretty Conundrum~~~~~~~~

"A Malaysian Education Minister was wondering why despite all the good work
done by the Family Planning Board, the Malay population in Kelantan semed
to leapfrog compared with other states which plodded on at average speed.

So accompanied by FPB officers, including a balanced team of male, female and mabe even in-between, the most honourable Minister checked into the first kampong household with SE7EN kids running outside with the chickens and cats and the housewife was merely 27 years old.

First the Minister interviewed the wife. She coyly said Yes, we practised family planning ("Perancangan Keluarga", proudly showing off a half dozen Condoms, fruit-flavoured, incldung guave and mangosteen. No, no durian nyet."Too smelly!" (Terlalu bau!" her exclamation.

Then separately, the ministerial team called in the husband working our in the paddy field. All smiles and sweat, Da Farmer greeted the high and low officials after washing his hands clean. His were somewhat polluted -- does NOt wish to be polluted some more, so he did not shake the visitors' proffered hands.

So you and your wife practised family planning, Yes?
Da Farmer nodded.
Please demo how you use the Condom...

Da Farmer took out a green banana -- it's solid and the closest to a penis in total erection mode. He carefully slipped the rubbery condom on the banana with a edft hand, mounted IT perfectly in a few seconds.

Well done, the Mnister said, now show us what do you do next...

Before I use IT on the wife, I would do like any good Muslim does -- I snip off the tip of the Condom like this...(Da proud Farmer cut off with a pair of scissors the protruding tip just as in circimsising a 12-year-old's penis ...
"Seperti Bersunat ini," he coyly smiled.

My deerest ER, please share with Yan (okay, Desi as well) your best answer to this Pretty Conundrum when your seven-year-old asks; Mummy, Daddy ~~ What's a Condom?

Yes, da prize:
The most hilarious answer gets a one leap year supply of free Durex, and in case it falls within that 0.1% of failure (ass in any poll, there's a certain margin of ellor!), one 'hole year of free Dumex...

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi, Desi,

I am at yantouch.wordpress.com.

Thank you for mentioning me, always.

Yan

Fashionasia said...

Desi...now i think howsy is teaching u notty stuffs!!or was it the other way around??

Howsy said...

Durex, Dumex...wicked rhyme! LOL!

chong y l said...

yan: Desi's bad -- too mush of Howsy's Mimi, Nicole and now Royal-Tea!
Problem FIXed -- there goes my 30% CONM...:)

chong y l said...

FAshionistA: No, yor are correct the first time around. Don't goStan!

Now about doing thta Makeover to improve Desi's chances at the Poll...? Game, but don't do a Rabit on me!:(

chong y l said...

Howsy~~ You're my sifu. We're EXpanding our French CONnexxions and Fashionista says you are MISSleading Desi into Badder terortry!:( Methinks I''d badder leave thee with Mave and Anak M!:)

Arena Green said...

*Blush* Too shy to comment on such notty stuff by all 3 Fun*s*tics.

chong y l said...

anak merdeka:

You too "shy", I dunno about dat!
Spinning love songs, dueting with THeels among the Highlands and Sunset...:) Did you see the Moon enticing thee, symbolically they embrace thee:(

Maverick SM said...

Desi is now a naughty boy, just like howsy. The two-some.

Howsy said...

We don't mind a four-some, do we? ;)

chong y l said...

mave SM/Howsy (Anak Merdeka in passing)~~ Desi is game for a 4-some as long as bro Mave confirms it's NOT against the Law in Malaysia, United Kingdom and Francais, and Ipoh and Fu Rong. 4 Rites!:) can do no Wrongs, I'm oso NOt a Wong, I dunno about the rest:(:(:(

Fashionasia said...

last night i saw Dumex advertisement.
Immediately i thought of 2 D's. Durex and Desi's post today. arggh!!

Ms.Fashion blames it on the desi. I can never look at Dumex the same way again.....

still thinking of a good answer. Why dont desi share share with us how u answer the little desi's????

chong y l said...

fashionistA:

Dumex is good for the baby that comes out after 9/10months jest in case 1 outr of 1,000 Durex does NOT work!

As to answer the pesky precocious 7-year-old:
* take out a green banana
* Mount Durex over it
(1) Don wan baby after 9/10months, DON't CUT!
(2) If want bayi, then Bersunat-lah! Before that, negotiate with Dumex for free supply.
OR contact Desi, we SUE Durex for RM20million:):)
My CUT--30%! LOLs.