My Anthem

Sunday, October 25, 2015

Laughter Is the BEST Medicine...UPDATED 31 OCt 20!5:( or :)

BUTT UMNO id.ots have been making the CUntry/NegaraKu the LAFFING STOCK of the w.w.w. udder NAjib R. R can stand for either Ros... or ring... or ROT...PLease don't spoil my socialist BF including ROticinnai!

SUndaes are usually for DEsi's rumination; give this a pass until I get to FIX THE TECHNICALS IN my blog settings -- maaf ia if my last two posts are all bunched together into ONE BIG LUMP _- you and I are lucky it's knot NR's SH+T!

JEst to pass some leisure time, let's try to ENJOY From donplaypuks:~~~~


Egg Jokes for Eggciting Times


PLease surg to donplaypuks.blogspot.com for aMORE!~~~~~~~

Fuck! Chicken Little, is that you??? courtesy of http://www.flickr.com/photos/36998705@N00/128517029/
malaysiasoros@terkini. ballsups_pseuds.con quotes
1. Jagdeep then asked Nizam (of Utusan) to explain what ultra vires meant, for the benefit of the court. Nizam looking confused, replied: “To insult.”Jagdeep then told Mohd Nizam that his misunderstanding of the word had caused chaos in the country because the word actually means “beyond the powers”. Malaysian Insider.

2. "Is Najib qualify to be next PM?" Now you know why the Ministry of (ms)Education wants to do away with teaching Science & Maths in English. It's an utter waste of time!

3. "It doesn't mean anything that Malaysia is No.185 in FIFA's World Rankings. That is determined only by the number of games you play in a year!!" ex-Malaysia football coach

4. "The presence of criminals also posed a threat to the safety of Police Officers. So, the Police Base was closed!" Minister for Home Office 17/10/08

UPDATED LUST DAE OF OCTOBER 20!5:

FRom a post burried in DRAFTS Which DEsi feels should be exposed to the free sunshine, water and air! OKAy, consider this as post for APRIL 1, 2016 if we are still not residents of TOng San as ZAhid would have wished for for elements like DEsi!

Okay, you first saw Laffing Stocks debuting at desiderata2000.blogspot.com some se7en years ago:)

Desi started its cyber Laughing Stocks Section on behalf of BurssMalaysiaBurstingAtItsSeaems some years ago as the time was right, and I believe I must give the StockXXchange a helping hand after it went into the doldrums following the Asian Financial Crisis -- remember Georgie Boy Sorrows an rogue trader who xxchanged hearty words with then PM Dr Mahathir Mohamad as their vocab was in Desi's league -- Recall the famous/infamous "You are a moron!" followed swiftly by riposte "Thou art a menace to thy cuntry!" or words to similar effect, and if my sperring is a byte off, blame it to my moUrn after PR failed to deny BN its twotwo-thirds in Sarawak.

Hitting the Gong to mark the proud occasion is the outgoig Bursa supraChairman; special guests included the famous/notorious three Datuk T stooges and RPK and HarisIb who as Chair and Prez of MCLM respectively who have jest been shortlisted to joing this Laughing Stocks section -- they are supermen of integrity" of just six to se7en months intafter birth teaching 50s established DAP and Pas and teenage 12-year-old {arti Keadilan Rakyat how to suck eggs claimng their self-annointed role of first selcting 20 to 30 men of integrity to contest G#13 under DAP or PKR banner, and just past few days, wanting to dish out advice to the Opposition by being "Father" to the well grownup opposition trio who proved themselves by winning 12plus3 not enough to make to 24 in the just ended Sarawak state elections.

May God save me from such hypocrits and imposters. Do they and their acolytes/disciples like Zoorroo aka Dr Quake, hawkeye and shanghaifish, Angele Ooi et all even know the meaning of "Civil"? __ Always using profanities and swear wordson other commenters who beg to disagree with Thrie Master's Voice at m2day and People's Parliament. People, my foot! It hurts!
~~ Amen

If you still can't catch it WHY I LISTED PDRM as a stock, here's why:

From the Star Online, and I double checked in ots print copy -- this churchmouseywritHer can still part wit' RM1,20! I do't BF at London's five-star hotels or Alson Klana in Seremban. I tehtarik'd wit' fellow koboi Ng and johnny at the Temian roadside Mamak, KKK!

Monday April 18, 2011
Cops probing those behind screening of sex video

By M. KUMAR
kumar@thestar.com.my

KUALA LUMPUR: Police are now investigating those who were responsible for screening the sex video allegedly involving a man resembling Opposition Leader Datuk Seri Anwar Ibrahim.

Deputy CID director Deputy Commissioner Datuk Acryl Sani Abdullah Sani said the police had yet to hear from the distributor of the Omega watch said to have been taken from the hotel room where the sex video was allegedly recorded.

He added that police could not force them to provide information on who was the watch owner.

“The identity of the watch's owner is not an issue in completing the investigation,” he said.

He also said the police had completed their probe into the sex video and the findings would be submitted to the Attorney-General's Chambers soon.

“However, we are not investigating the identity of the man in the video, but the ones responsible for the screening of it,” he said yesterday.

The 22-minute video, which was time-stamped as Feb 21, featured a man resembling the Opposition Leader having sex with a woman.

The video was screened to journalists on March 21 by “Datuk T”. Three men later came forward and admitted that they were Datuk T.

The trio were former++++Malacca chief minister Tan Sri Abdul Rahim Tamby Chik, businessman Datuk Eskay Abdullah and former Perkasa treasurer Datuk Shuaib Lazim.

DESIDERATA:
Hey!
Deputy CID director Deputy Commissioner Datuk Acryl Sani Abdullah Sani, and to thy boss the IGP: You should have arrested the THREE DATUK T STOOGES++++ above on Day 1 at Carcosa Seri Negara itseif! You get listed on the xxchange BUT DON'T MAKE US MALAYSIANS THE LAUGHING STOCK of the www -- can read as WHOLE WIDE WORLD or worldwideweb:)


*********************************** Desi pmpers his esteemedreaders by googling, hence reprsing the famous speech which contains that beaut quote -- thou look for it thyself, K! I lead you as a horse to water, I can't make you drink it2! ~~ YL, Desi,knotttyaSsusual


George Soros Responds to
Dr. Mahathir Bin Mohamad: I AM NOT A MORON

Speech at the World Bank Meeting in Hong Kong, September 20, 1997
Printed in the Executive Intelligence Review, October 3, 1997.
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From the prepared text of the speech by George Soros at the IMF/World Bank meeting in Hongkong, Sept. 21.

Let me start with the obvious. We do live in a global economy. But it is characterized not only by the free movement of goods and services but, above all, by the free movement of ideas and of capital. This applies both to direct investments and to financial transactions. Both have been gaining in importance ever since the end of the Second World War; but the globalization of financial markets, in particular, has accelerated in recent years, until it reached a point where movements in exchange rates, interest rates and stock prices in various countries are intimately interconnected. In this respect, the character of the financial markets has changed out of all recognition during the 40 years that I have been involved in them. So in talking about the global economy, it may be more appropriate to speak about the global capitalist system.

There can be no doubt that global integration has brought tremendous benefits....

But global capitalism is not without its problems. I shall devote most of my speech to these problems, because they are not well understood, and we need to understand them better if we want the system to survive....

Financial markets are inherently unstable and international financial markets even more so. International capital flows are notorious for their boom-bust pattern. During the boom period, capital flows from the center to the periphery; but when confidence is shaken, it has a tendency to return where it came from. During the 40 years I have spent in international financial markets, I have seen many ebbs and flows and booms and busts. I fully recognize that international capital markets have become much more institutional in character and demonstrate much greater resilience, but I cannot believe that the present boom will not be followed by a bust until history has proven me wrong.

This risk of a breakdown is greatly increased by the fact that our theoretical understanding of how financial markets operate is fundamentally flawed. Economic theory has been built on the concept of equilibrium, and in my view, that concept is quite inappropriate. In my view there is no such thing as equilibrium in financial markets because market participants are trying to discount a future which is itself shaped by market expectations. This renders the outcome indeterminate and it is only by accident that the actual course of events will correspond to the prevailing expectations.... I am told that economic theory itself has gone a long way towards recognizing and studying disequilibrium situations. Nevertheless, the laissez-faire idea that markets should be left to their own devices remains very influential. I consider it a dangerous idea. The instability of financial markets can cause serious economic and social dislocations. The question poses itself: What should be done to preserve the stability of the financial system? Dr. Mahathir's suggestion yesterday to ban currency trading is so inappropriate that it does not deserve serious consideration. Interfering with the convertibility of capital at a moment like this is a recipe for disaster. Dr. Mahathir is a menace to his own country.

But the recent turmoil in Asian markets raises some thorny issues about currency pegs, asset bubbles, inadequate banking supervision, and the lack of financial information, which cannot be ignored. Markets cannot be left to correct their own mistakes, because they are liable to overreact and to behave in an indiscriminate fashion. For instance, it is a grave mistake not to discriminate between Malaysia and Indonesia....

Since the end of the Second World War, the state has played an increasing role in maintaining economic stability, ensuring equality of opportunity and providing a social safety net, particularly in the highly industrialized countries of Europe and America. But the capacity of the state to look after the welfare of its citizens has been severely impaired by the globalization of the capitalist system, which allows capital to escape taxation much more easily than labor. Capital will tend to avoid countries where employment is heavily taxed or heavily protected, leading to a rise in unemployment. That is what has happened in Continental Europe. I am not defending the antiquated social security systems on the continent of Europe, which are badly in need of reform; but I am expressing concern about the reduction in welfare services both in Europe and in America....

If social services are cut too far while instability is on the rise, it may well engender popular resentment and lead to a new wave of protectionism both in the United States and in Europe, especially if and when the current boom is followed by a bust of some severity. This could lead to a breakdown in the global capitalist system, just as it did in the 1930s....

I should like to stress one particular aspect of the open society which is of critical importance at the present moment: the freedom of information.

For example, I have been subjected to all kinds of false and vile accusations by Dr. Mahathir. He is using me as a scapegoat to cover up his own failure. He is playing to a domestic audience and he couldn't get away with it if he and his ideas were subject to the discipline of independent media inside Malaysia. The freedom of information is as indispensable in Asia as in the rest of the world.


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Sunday, November 11, 2007


Laughing Stocks Rally to Historic Peaks


November 10, 2007 is a watershed in Malaysia's political landscape when it saw a "V"ictorious Peoples's Rally of at least 40,000 people gathering under the BERSIH ("clean" in Bahasa Malaysia) banner to demand for fair, free and clean elections. The assembly of peaceful and concerned Malaysians putting aside race, colour or creed or gender successfully braved police warnings and the inclement weather to march to the vicinity of Istana Negara grounds around the appointed time of 3.00pm to about 4.15pm (when the assembly was officially dismissed after the Memorandum had been handed over officially to an Palace official) to support a delegation of leaders headed by PAS, PKR, DAP and BERSIH leaders to hand over a Memorandum for Electoral Reforms to his Royal Highess, the Yang diPertuan Agong.

If there were no Internet, especially the emergent Fifth Estate (Blogosphere), and foreign agencies to cover the historic event, the Malaysian populace would have been hoodwinked by the mainstream media (MSM) in the English language and Government-controlled national news agency BERNAMA and RTM1 and RTM2.

The figures of the people who gathered to show their solidarity cited by these media, including The Star and NST, ran into single digit THOUSAND people only, and therefore is a non-event. I sighted some reports attributed to the Star stating 3,000 or 4,000 participants (Readers, please help me out here as I was too busy surfing tocheck as many news accounts as possible and did not properly C&P the figures...I humbly stand to be corrected.)
(PLease note I am not including the newspapers in the Chinese and Tamil and BM languages here.)


The People's Paper's
editors must be blind that day, and its reporters and photographers must have been blindfolded, because they could not notice large groups of Malaysians crowding around Kuala Lumpur, half of them prominent in Yellow T-shirts displaying BERSIH's objectives, as part of the November 10 Rally. NOT A SINGLE PICTURE anywhere is sighted in the daily. Instead they dutifully trained their eyes and ears on what should have been a page 13 story but played upon page N4,
headlined:

Thousands at open house

Kuala Lumpur: Despite the heavy downpour, more than 10,000 city folk turned up at the Hari Raya open house hosted by Federal Territories Minister Datuk Seri Zulhasnan Rafique at his Taman Tasik Titiwangsa residence.

(Desi stops at first para -- the rest is laughing stock staff, soon to be listed.)

They also reported on page N8 three Rally-related items, but not a single picture of the POLICE or FEDERAL RESERVE UNIT firing tear-gas and water cannons on the participants gathered by the thousands. As hinted by the headline of the news report at the top of page:

Cops break up march
Teargas and water cannons used on illegal assembly, 245 held

Desi asks a question here of these Fourth Estate buggers -- Didn't they teach you in the newsroom the value of ACTION SHOTS?

Instead there was a large "passive" photo in the middle of same page, captioned Traffic bottleneck: Vehicles trickling through a police roadblock at a section of the print Expressway in Petaling Jaya yesterday (Sunday Star, 11 November, 2007).

And finally who else to be BIG MOUTH mouthing the predictable rubbish befitting a Malaysian DPM -- but he would have been laughed off the stage other than the PWTC and RTM's -- at the bottom of page, headlined:

Najib on why police did not permit gathering

___________________________________

My regular reader "V" then pointed Desi to another equally arresting Minister who raised laughter to a new(s) peak, and Malaysians must thank KL-headquarteed AL-JAZEERA for bringing us prime news entertainment, via:

"http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A1_GQ-K7P_w&eurl=http://www.jeffooi.com/2007/11/nov_10_and_zam_turned_yellow.php"

And BERNAMA followed up with a RATIONALISATION for its overseeing Boss, ZAM, who with Putrajaya's 4th Floor boys, must have impressed their 15th century Fourth Estate mindset to the Star and NST GEICs the "ideal perceptions" to own to play their role to reach new peaks in journalism. Of course their Datuk title helps. And ZAM is an eminent role model as he was once GEIC of Utusan Malaysia, the leading BM and famous UMNO BIG Mouthpiece in Malaysia.

"
11/11: Zam refutes Al Jazeera's claim police used force on protesters

(Bernama) -- Information Minister Datuk Seri Zainuddin Maidin has refuted satellite television station Al Jazeera's claim that police had used force on hundreds of protesters here today.

He told the station that police had tried to disperse the protesters by using water cannons as the gathering was illegal.

"When they refused to disperse, the police allowed them to march to Istana Negara to hand over a memorandum demanding for a clean and fair election.

"The police managed to handle the situation as best they could," he said over the phone in a live interview by Al Jazeera here. He was responding to the illegal assembly organised by the Coalition for Clean and Fair Elections or "Bersih" comprising 26 non-governmental organisations and which also involved opposition parties, to hand over the memorandum containing their demands, to Istana Negara.

Asked why Malaysia did not allow such gatherings, Zainuddin said they were unnecessary because general elections had been held without fail in this country and according to the scheduled dates.

The minister also hit out at Al Jazeera for having the wrong perception when posing questions. Al Jazeera reporters had their own perceptions about Malaysia before coming here, he said, adding that "Malaysia is not Myanmar or Pakistan; it is a democratic country".

Zainuddin said many television viewers in Malaysia were laughing at the antics of the Al Jazeera reporter who seemed to be trying to portray the situation as ugly.

"The reporter was seen shouting, so much so the situation seemed unreal to the viewers."He also criticised Al Jazeera for only interviewing journalists known to be pro-opposition but not getting the government's views."


I heard my kopitiam blogger friends and readers saying maybe soon Bursaa Malaysiaa would be listing a new category of shares under "laughing stocks". Minister Zam Zam ala Kazam aka Minister of Propaganda-ganda Wand Anda will flag off par value stocks of RM1 at a special price of RM0.01 to all journalists of his mindset and perception. Malaysian journalists working for Al Jazeera and all foreign wires are not allowed to apply for the new share issues. They don't understand the rationale forlisting laughing stocks.

When the stock market resumes trading on Mondae, it’s anticipated NSTPP and The STarr Pubications would be transferred to the "Laughing Stocks" category as most appropriate to keep the Minister of Propaganda-ganda Wand Anda company:( BERNAMA and RTM are expected to be listed very soon after they confer Tan Sriship on the CEs, and the stocks will rise to great peaks to generate funds for the BN to finance their leaders ERECTIONS.


posted by desiderata

 

 

stocked cuntries in the w.w.w!

 

 

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And from a fellow BUMmer who brought the Day forward by two short weeks, courtesy of Hornbill Unmasked:)~~~~

 

March 16, 2015

Always April Fools

Filed under: Politics — Hornbill Unleashed @ 8:00 AM 
Though there are still two weeks to go before April 1, we might as well follow the lead of Malaysia’s clownishly criminal ever-ruling regime and celebrate Hari April Fool in advance.
Or indeed every day, in light of the fact that the members, cronies and sycophants of Umno/BN have been making very bad jokes at the expense of the Malaysian people day in, day out for decades.
And now that less and less people are seeing the funny side of this rank regime’s pernicious pranks, it seems hell-bent on laughing in Malaysians’ faces more insultingly than ever.
As evidenced, for example, by its timing of the launch of its goods and services tax (GST) for this April Fools’ Day, as if to make a point of what a jolly jape it is to make every Malaysian pay compensation for the countless billions stolen from the nation’s coffers by Umno/BN.
And of course it’s not just the timing that makes the GST such a joke, but also the amazing jumble of goods and services that are zero-rated or exempted altogether in favour of special-interest groups related to or supportive of the regime.
But the GST, or, in other words, the graft and stealing tax, is far from the only piece of funny business this ludicrous regime is entertaining Malaysians and the rest of the world with in the lead-up to this April Fools’ Day.
In fact the list of current Umno/BN comedy routines is almost endless in both number and duration. One of the longest-running, for example, is what could, as long as we’re so close to 1 April, be appropriately called Altantuya Fools’ Day or more accurately eight years of days, a production so ridiculous it would have had us all dying laughing by now if it wasn’t so tragic.
Then, in much the same vein, there’s the latest of a whole series of Anwar Fools’ Days, complete with a road-show featuring rib- or rather nipple-tickling public appearances by one of Umno/BN’s troupe of performing legal jesters, Muhammad Shafee Abdullah (left), under the auspices of the laughably useless and increasingly youthless Youth and Sports Minister, Khairy Jamaluddin.
But the Shafee/Khairy show, as hilarious or even hilarious as it may have been, wasn’t nearly such a hoot as the more recent Anwar Ibrahim-related farce enacted for a global audience by the Umno/BN cyber-comedians who got sprung by the White Housetrying to fake public opposition to a John Malott-inspired pro-Anwar petition to the US president.
The very same president, of course, who must have been far from amused at Malaysian Prime Minister Najib Abdul Razak’s recent attempts to use him as a straight-man in his comical attempt to fool the Malaysian audience that his so-called ‘golfing diplomacy’ in Hawaii took precedence over the floods back home.
Speaking of Najib, the man who has arguably done more to caricature himself as the very personification of a crooked politician and make Malaysia an international laughing-stock than anybody but the supreme sultan of sarcastic self-satire, Dr Mahathir, he’s always good for a droll one-liner.
Unintentionally droll, unfortunately, as he clearly has not a shred of wit or the sense of humour.
Dead-pan comedy classics
Though somehow that makes him all the funnier when he comes up with such dead-pan comedy classics as ‘making Malaysia the world’s best democracy’, ‘zero tolerance of corruption’, ‘kangkung economics’ and ‘RM1 chickens’, or more contemporary zingers like‘inheritance’ in explanation of his wealth and “rubbish” in response to calls from Malaysiakini for his comments on the Altantuya case.
Of course his consort, Rosmah Mansor, is always good for a belly laugh too, as Malaysia’s iconic cartoonist Zunar never tires of observing. Rosmah’s claim that she was able to afford obscenely expensive products because she had “saved up since small” was almost enough to turn April Fools’ into April Jewels Day.
And her more recent quip that the forthcoming joke GST might save her some of the RM1,200she pays for a home-delivered hair dye and snip surely cemented her status as the world’s funniest First Lady.
But as great a giggle as Najib and Rosmah may be, they’ve got some pretty hot competition in the comedy department from a whole gaggle of up-and-coming and supporting acts.
Like the whole cast of relatives, friends and cronies in the 1Malaysia Development Berhad (1MDB) show, from alleged ‘financier’ Jho Low (right in photo), whocan’t see why anyone would think it’s funny as in strange that he or his buddy, Rosmah’s son and Najib’s stepson Riza Aziz, can afford high-end New York real estate, to the members of the Umno/BN regime cabinet, who have collectively given 1MDB a clean bill of health.
Surely Najib is joking, too, in fact experiencing a personal April Fools’ Day, in trying to convince himself that his staging of an ‘investigation’ of his ridiculous 1MDB, by a ‘special taskforce’comprising his compromised attorney-general, Keystone-Kops-style police force and utterly useless Malaysian Anti-corruption Commission (MACC) will placate the Malaysian public, let alone foreign governments and financial regulators.
Certainly there’s no sign that such transparently contrived antics are fooling former prime minister Mahathir, who, let’s face it, should recogniae a massive financial fraud when he sees one, having presided over and escaped liability for literally countless such scams during his own 22 years in office.
But if Najib and his gang’s gags as in jokes aren’t going over too well these days, at least, thanks to Home Minister Ahmad Zahid Hamidi, himself something of a joke as a result of a letter he wrote to the FBI in support of an allegedly criminal Malaysian gambling identity, Umno/BN’s long-standing gag as in silencer on the mainstream media remains firmly in place.
Thus the regime continues to keep as many Malaysians as possible living in some kind of permanent April Fools’ Day, and as both witlessly amused and unwittingly abused as ever, by such nonsense as Najib’s recent declaration that “I cannot imagine Malaysia without Umno, especially Malays and Muslims.”
“The answer will make Malays destitutes in their own country,” he went on and on at the close of the Perak Umno convention and Umno branches conference 2015 in Ipoh, before concluding by urging the practice of “no longer rigid politics but new politics.”
But lest his listeners imagine he meant the end of Umno/BN corruption or ‘money politics’, he immediately retracted this statement with the words “but this does not mean the old politics cannot be practiced… some politics of development, needed by the people, is the core to the old politics that still needs to be implemented by us.”
In other words, for Najib and his Umnoputras, the vast majority of other Malaysians of every race, creed and condition are just a bunch of April Fools with no choice but to blindly obey regime rules and cough-up the cash for which Umno/BN drools. — DEAN JOHNS

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