My Anthem

Sunday, April 30, 2006

Art Thou a Ramblin' Rose?

If thou art one, you are in good company.
Desi enjoys some rambling too...
But just a word of cayution -- Don't venture into rarified terrotry -- you might land up being a target of an ex-PM and his cronies...

But if that croonie was of RC orde, it's okay as he/she would be sympathetic -- and know your rambling is called serenading.





Ramblin Rose
Nat King Cole Lyrics

Ramblin' rose, ramblin' rose
Why you ramble, no one knows

Wild and wind-blown, that's how you've grown
Who can cling to a ramblin' rose?

Ramble on, ramble on
When your ramblin' days are gone
Who will love you with a love true
When your ramblin' days are through?

Ramblin' rose, ramblin' rose
Why I want you, heaven knows
Though I love you with a love true
Who can cling to a ramblin' rose?

SPOKEN:
One more time, everybody, now

Ramblin' rose, ramblin' rose
Why I want you, heaven knows
Though I love you with a love true
Who can cling to a ramblin' rose?



Who are the roses out there, on this vast human landscape breaking hearts as iconic inspiration for Ray Charles' lament on his Rambling Rose?


Maybe it's not a person, could IT be the system?
Could IT be your Government -- you fellows abroad tell Desi!



When The Star frontpage greeted Desi with this headline, I almost broke into proFUNity, but there were many kids around. Compare the news extracts with Desi's substitution,

Poor pay keeping best brains away

Desi's substitution:
The race-based politics driving and keeping best brains away

Secong point as reported by The Star
"...and an obession with world-record breaking..."

Desi's adding:... led by many misguided national leaders who obviously were on interested in promoting themselves, not national, or international, interests.
Recall: DPM handing the Jalur Gemilang to an A-team ready to fly to drape a giant-sized Malaysia' Flag over the Pyramid in Egpyt, even before getting the permission of the host government!
What arrogance in assuming the Egyptian government would agree with a Third World mentality that the targeted "task" would amounto to an international feat worthy of a record recognition?

Desi would not go further on this news report because he deemed it an exercise in futility.
The Government' s efforts in doing this survey in the first place, as in previous exercises to attract back Malaysians abroad to serve the NegaraKu, would prove useless because the intention and mechanics were suspect in the first place.
When a scientist conducts an experiment, he must make safe and well grounded assumptions.
But this Government has made many false assumptions and premises, even promoting myths, and I believe my ER know what Desi has been writing about relating to this matter, so I won't bore thee travelling that patth again. It also spoils our AP-petite, and we don't have the right AP, do we?

So my opinion on the Star report~~
Not sincere. Not committed. Brainless.
The Government need not agree. I'm just an ordinary citizen rambling on a Lazy, Hazy Sunday.

Now I'm done with Politics -- which would turn your hair white faster than you can say WHF! so don't indulge too much in P -- let's turn this INTER:LUDE to some Ramblings in Verse, can, so I can adjourn for a good dinner?


From Poets.org, A Poem A Day

The Primer
by Christina Davis


She said, I love you.

He said, Nothing.


(As if there were just one
of each word and the one
who used it, used it up).

In the history of language
the first obscenity was silence.


DESIDERATA: But obscenities, like rambling, are indeed therapeutic after all. Fair, may not be compleatly justified.

Earlier in my ramblinmg at a fewllow Blogger's place in response to olde schoool romatising ala-Wordsworth, Browning and Keats, Desi was in a naughty, even rascally mood, mode? penning tis based on his updated knowledge of what's into the 3G generation, and what? SPG, and the Bangsar yuppies!

So take this with a opich of salt -- off course, it won't go wella with your CON BF if you're steal having one at this late hour (It's 6.50PM as I update this):


from an UN-Coy predator



but modern man has no time
to stand and stare
miss, i have the dime
thy beaut bod tonite can spare?


pick them up at yuppies haunt
bangsar, holiday villa
open up one's purse, answer all her wont
like Instant coffee,
Ecstasy comes with the IceCream vanilla


tonight's already too far into the day
let's hit the hay -- not wait for May
that's the month for dumd asses like Wordsworth
DreamersI mayhaps some foolish Daisie


I want thy curvy body how
I've the time,
and it's NOW
You can have my dime
Sextify me, sanctify me,
with a wOw


(9:10 AM, April 26, 2006)

POSTSCRIPT BUT FAST!


It did not take 1-1/2months, and frankly, also proves that sometimes
Leopards can lose a spot or two.

Maybe not, it's just anothing Ramblin' Thorn--
I don't know -- Isn't MICA a component of the Barisan Nasional?
You tell me, I'm politically miss-informed. I'm jest another Rambling r...,


From The SundayStar
April 30, 2006


ASM shares went to the rich, says Samy


KUALA LUMPUR: MIC president Datuk Seri S. Samy Vellu is up in arms over the recent sale of Amanah Saham Malaysia (ASM) shares, claiming that it was dominated by the rich.

The reason why the one billion shares had been snapped up in less than two hours, he said, was that several rich buyers had bought them up in bulk.

“There should have been fair distribution of the shares, particularly for the Indian community.

“The shares that went that day made the rich richer and the poor poorer in terms of opportunities,” Samy Vellu said.

The Indian community, he said, needed the shares to improve their income.

“But at the rate things are going, should the Government decide to launch another round of ASM shares, they will still not have a chance to buy the shares,” he said after chairing a central working committee at MIC headquarters here yesterday.

Samy Vellu, who is also Works Minister, said although the shares were sold on the open market, the poor should have been given a chance to buy them.

He said he planned to lead a delegation soon to see Datuk Seri Abdullah Ahmad Badawi to present a document on the “unfair distribution” of ASM shares.

He said he would also present a document to the Prime Minister on the MIC's programmes for the development of socio-economic activities for the Indian community.

Samy Vellu said studies done by the MIC on the economic performance of Indians showed a significant drop in equity holdings from 1.5% in 2000 to 1.2% in 2004.

“One of the reasons for this was slow equity development – the Indians' equity holdings went up by 5.6% against 12.4% for the Chinese and 12.4% for bumiputras,” he said.

PPS: Wonder if Pak Lah will have a word or two with his Vocal-ist Minister?As Howsy would croon: Ayo-yo Sami...

Saturday, April 29, 2006

A Shaolin Tiger Mauling In The 4th Estate?

DESIDERATA was pleasantly "surprised" by a fellow Blogger -- not from the Press -- sharing some observations about the Malaysian 4th Estate which I found highly accurate. Playing a sort of moderator this morning, Desi thanks the Shaolin Tiger for permit to "reprise" his thoughts -- Yes, we all all following the trail blazed by JeffOoi of Screenshots fame -- to THINKING ALLOWED. I'll follow with some whsipered comments if you continue to lend me your ears. Or give me back an earful if you dissent. We are aloud to be disagreeable you know at Desi's Place. Just be genteel about IT because I always love the feminine touch! Oouch!

April 27, 2006 from a smiling tiger, mauling somewhere in an estate in Kuala Lumpur:

The State of Traditional Media and Newspapers in Malaysia

Smart people don't seem to read the local newspapers, nor any businessmen worth their salt (The Edge anyone?). As they are all pretty much biased, washed out tabloid trash.

Smart people read news online (BBC, CNN, Malaysiakini, Jeff Ooi) or read foreign papers, even those papers such as The Times of India are much better.

It seems people prefer to pay more for some decent news rather than the local papers which are only good for wrapping tomorrows nasi lemak in.

Even in the US the traditional media has shifted its paradigm toward the online medium, advertisers are pulling out of the printed papers and spending more heavily on the websites (Below the Line).

Look at the Washington Post for example, it's an amazing site with a blog, trackbacks and integrated Technorati features.

According to a new forecast by Forrester Research, as much as 8 percent of all advertising spending will shift online by the year 2010. Much of this shift will come at the expense of tradional media channels such as magazines, direct mail and newspapers.

The problem with local media in my opinion is:

1) It's sloppy, there are spelling mistakes, factual mistakes, research mistakes and so on, it's basic Journalism 101, please check your facts before publishing

2) It's heavily censored, only what the government wants to come out comes out (seems to be the current government too, or whichever party that paper has an alliance to), sometimes feels a little like China

3) The content is poor, often syndicated and unoriginal, where is the real journalism, the hard talk, the cutting edge stories?

4) The specialist sections are just as bad, In-tech? Anyone even know which days it comes out? Anyone use it for anything other than eating their dinner on?

The television is just as bad, magazines are pretty poor too but seem to be getting better at least.

People just don't care about newspapers here, stats show more than half of people that read newspapers don't actually buy them, they just read them in the office because they are there. It's a vicious circle, people don't care, people don't read, papers stay crappy, biased and with low circulations.

For example I got a URL in a national newspapers and saw a massive surge in hits of 0, yeah 0, no extra hits, no one read the paper and went online. Well if they did, it was less than 100 people, so I didn't notice the difference.

If you did that in UK you'd get at least 100,000 hits over a week as BryanBoy saw when he was published in the UK Telegraph.

Sadly I don't know what we can do to fix it, but well some of us are working on something to bring the new media and traditional media closer together, at least it's a step in the right direction. It just seems to be taking forever to get started.

Bah I don't even want to start on the quality of the television shows, argh! Comedy? You call that comedy? I call it 4 decades outdated slapstick that only appeals to people with IQs of 60 or below.

Here ends the Post stolen as Nutgift from shaolintiger.comflagging off
"Inane Ramblings of a Brit in Malaysia Eating, Drinking, Diving and Partying!"

where this noesybody left a footprint, again C&P here, with my ER' indulgence. Care not I if thy indulgence is reluctantly giv'n!

ylchong says:

"When media are all directly or indirectly controlled by BN component parties, what do you expect the senior journalists do?

They play politics! They write and bow in accordance with the best wishes of the political masters, and at the workplace, it's THE SAME as in government departments -- or worse, as the end-product is on public display in all its pub'ic display in all its naked (and nu'es) glory!

I've been a member there -- where PR has got two connotations -- both -ve -- public relations (I almost was tempted to put an apostrophe in place of the ""l" again...) and PROstitution.

But at least the oldest profession practitioners don't scream they are the 4th Estate! Silently some real personal estate.

I agree with one commenter: Is the so called emerging 5th Estate any better? Also aligned with political and NGO interests -- motivation is also the same -- almighty $ sign unless you're some "socialists" (dying breed) which even the Government won't wish to "register" as a group, and some smartass "anarchists" fronting as Online Democrats.

April 28th, 2006 at 1:29 pm


I hope the following conversationist won't mind my "borrowing" his comment to be also shared here as a Nugget?~~~~~~~~

vincent says:

"Actually dude, while I agreee that mainstream sucks, a lot of the online shit is just as bad.

Compare Star and NST with Malaysiakini and JeffOoi?

Different lie. Same bullshit."

DESIDERATA: My dear raeders, chew over the Post by Shaolin Tiger and share your esteemed views? Also do you agree with those mighty "strong" words by Vincent? Starry, scary nights, my 4th and 5th Estaters?

Now can I try to entertain thee with a couple of anecdotes, a reward for thy patience?

I was in the newsroom surfing the LAN message board when an interesting memo caught my roving eys. It's was a Memo from a Senior Editor to the reporters of less than 100 words, like those schooldays advice from your Principal advising proper behavior by the pupils read out at Monday assembly, remember? You know, emphasising discipline, be good boys and girls, show manners to teachers and elders, etc...

Except the newsroom Memo of about 80 words contained one dozen HOWLERS...You know the mistakes in grammar, sentence construction that make the reader howl! Alamak! from a senior Editor!

It would have been ignored except one cheeky More Senior Editor followed up with a Comment pointing out the dozen mistakes.Soon three quarters of the newsroom were buzzing (blogspeak : "kaypohciking?") with hilarious remarks about their seniors Raja's -- or was it Jaguh Kampong? -- Engrish.

Half an hour later there was complete pandemonium (No-lah, it's Desi using hyperbole, boleh-kan?) when another kaypoh Senior Editor came to the defence of the first err-ing Editor by pointing out half a dozen mistakes in the More Senior Editor's Comment!

Aiyah, Desi was about to arbitrate with his Shake up the 'hole newsroom with A-spearing finale but he was stopped in his tracks. The Editor-in_chief said there is now a complete ban of all comments on the issue.

Now you can see Shaolin Tiger's grounds about ..."It's sloppy, there are spelling mistakes, factual mistakes, research mistakes and so on, it's basic Journalism 101, please check your facts before publishing"...?

I REST. SHAOLIN'S CASE. Mine2. Vincent3.

"Starry, starry nights..."
Yeah, I was uploading @1.15AM after paying my respects at fellow journalist MGG Pillai's residence in Brickfields at the wake marking the passing on of an icon of the 4th & 5th Estates. I'm looking out of my window at the moon, the stars, and I say a silent prayer that My Buddy Rest In Peace. A LIfe TRuly WEll LIved. WEll LOved.
Amen.

Friday, April 28, 2006

MGG PILLAI: Irrepressible Journalist

I just came back from reading JeffOoi's Screenshots latest entry:
"Goodbye, MGG Pillai"

"The veteran journalist who covered the Vietnam War, got expelled from Singapore as a foreign correspondent, and the man behind MGGPillai.com, passed on at 10:40hr today due to heart complication."

I'm sorry to learn the demise of a gentlemen friend and an irrepressible pressman of dynamic coverage -- both in physical size and mental landscape. Dear buddy, I'll miss your ready smiles at lunch and tea meetings at Brickfields curry-on-banana-leaf abd capati, and of course, our tehtarik.

May the Mahaguru of fearless journalism be always remembered for, IMHO, his most famous quote when then PM Tun Dr Mahathir Mohamad was building his office and official residence in Putrajaya as having said ..."THE KING LIVES IN KUALA LUMPUR ...THE EMPEROR LIVES IN PUTRAJAYA."

On behalf of those who know him -- a little or well, DESIDERATA extends our heartfelt condolences to the family.

One may not agree with his views, but one can't fault him for his fighting spirit and dogged consistency, and a passion for writing. His CHIAROSCURO column gives us nuggets of wisdom and insights into political events in the country -- how we will miss the varying degrees of greys that lie in between the extremes of Black and White, and how MGG helps us to interpret in "reading in between the lines".


FARE THEE WELL, BUDDY

A fine gentleman with a biting humour
You also love him for his rumour
Hi MGG, you are moving on
I will always see your encompassing smile
Though I have not embraced your Krushchev hug
Fare thee well
We salute thee
For a life well lived

The crooked bridge has not sunk, unlike the Titanic

I think most movie-goers of THE TITANIC won't remember much of the plot involving the two young lovers, but the strains of "My heart will go on ..." by CELINE DION , not correcting ori when Desi said byWhitney Houston, dumbass!... continue to haunt many love-struck fans.

Now with love-struck fans of the Crooked Bride, they just wouldn't allow the Bridge to Nowhere sink into the Straits of Johor. NO. NO. NO.

First former PM versus current inherited FM.

In the FACE-OFF like a Gunfight at the non-OK Corral to which Mr Mathhias Chang took offence that the NST demeaned the status of the former PM vs a FM!

Then like playing hot pursuit the following day,
Special aide to former PM versus inherited FM,
asking the latter to resign.
Then FM replaced by TAN SRI ABDUL FUZI RAZAK, who served as Secretray-General in the Foreign Ministry and was involved in key negotiations with Singapore delegation, now Amassador-at-large who was roped in to face the concerted blaring of horns from the former PM and former aide.

WHY CAN'T THE PAST LEADERS LEAVE THE PRESENT PRIME MINISTER
TO GET STARTED IN STEERING THER NATION'S SHIP
THE WAY AND DIRECTION HE DEEMS FIT?


Especially when one had been given a generous 22 long years to prove his mettle (metal?) and his cronies and kakis to croon their songs and walk the path laden with gold, oil and platinum?

But being more a journalist than politician, I have got only one key point to make regarding all this Sandiwara, Opera or Singalong...

MR MATTHIAS CHANG, a lawyer, and a former special aide to Tun Dr Mahathir Mohamad, said that the Official secrets Act was "no morer an issue" pertaining to the detailed documents on the bilateral negotiations on the BRIDGE because Singapore had already publicised it.

I'm no lawyer, but can I direct one question at Mr Chang? Just because a Malaysian Classified Document was released by someone in a foreign land, and therefore now in the opublic domain, a Malaysian can automatically pick up this document and freely circulate it in the country and not be liable to prosecution under the OSA/ISA?


One readerat JeffOoi's Screenshots had also similarly asked :: : "Does Mr. Chang mean that a foreign government has a right to declassify our classified documents? By simply exposing it..."
and a bee-sybody journalist followed up with, now slightly edited-lah for Clarity as I just got back here from CLARITYofNIGHT!:::

"Remember Ezam Mohd Nor, Keadilan Youth chief -- he was charged under OSA for (making public)information which was already circulated on the Internet then. What's good for the goose is good for the gander.

I call on the Gomemn to charge Dr Mahathir and Mr Chang under OSA by the same token of Ezam's fate if truly the information publicised by the Singapore Gomen is still classified "Rahsia" by the Malaysian Gomen.

This is not taking any side -- it's giving the same medicine -- whether ex-PM, Keadilan Youth head or lawyer, or loyar buluk, or JoePublic!"

DESIDERATA has seen so much of DOUBLE STANDARDS by the politicians and mainstream media practitioners (No wonder they ranked right down there in the dumps in "Trustworthiness" survey findings released recently, seen that?), I'm geting a bit fed-up with pages and pages of shouting on the Bridge Issue by past regime voices and by present voices which were part&parcel of that past regime ...

HEY, DOES OUT GOVERNMENTT GOVERN WITH POLICIES BASED ON PRINCIPLES ANYMORE?

And what is Gerbang Perdana and the people behind IT?
Paying them RM100million for a folly made by Past and Present Politicians and it's TAX-PAYERS' MONEY DOWN THE DRAIN INTO THE JOHOR STRAITS.

The slugfest doesn't seem to be abating ~~~
face-of again ~~~ in the NST today:

'Fuzi's just RAMBLING' (page 6)

The Scenic Bridge: ‘Fuzi’s just rambling...’
28 Apr 2006


KUALA LUMPUR:
No one is being spared Tun Dr Mahathir Mohamad’s venom these days — not even Tan Sri Fuzi Abdul Razak, the seasoned, mild-mannered and respected diplomat.


In the latest instalment of his attack on the Government for scrapping the plan to build the bridge to replace the Causeway, the former prime minister took issue with Fuzi’s comprehensive defence of that decision on April 25.

He called the explanation rambling and unconvincing. convincing at all.

“Tan Sri Fuzi’s rambling explanation about the bridge serves only to convince that the Government’s priority and intention is to sell sand to Singapore. If it is not allowed to do so, then Malaysia will not get its bridge,” said Dr Mahathir in a 16-point statement.

::(The ambassador-at-large --- see separate sidebar***)


Tun Dr Mahathir said that his reading of the Wayleave Agreement signed between both countries showed that there was no specific provision for Singapore’s approval before relocating the Public Utilities Board water pipelines.

He noted that there had been many alterations to the Causeway and pipelines in the past without any objection from Singapore or Malaysia.

Tun He also Dr Mahathir called attention to a letter he received from former Singapore Prime Minister Goh Chok Tong stating that he had no objections if Malaysia intended to replace its side of the Causeway with a bridge.

“Thus a unilateral decision became bilateral when Singapore acceded and accepted. Any change must similarly be agreed to by both sides,” he said.

DESIDERATA: I'm truncating the long report -- otherwise, it will go on forever...I don't want my ER tobe haunted by IT!

"Tan Sri Fuzi's rambling
expalanation about the
bridge serves only to
convince that the Government's
priority and intention is to sell
sand to Singapore. If it
is not allowed to do so,
then Malaysia will not
get its bridge."
-- Dr Mahathir

and

Detailed account of
options available to us
(Page 7)

SIDEBAR: ~~~~~~~~On April 25, ***the ambassador-at-large had said that scrapping the bridge was the best option given the strong opposition to Malaysia selling sand to the republic and allowing the use of Malaysian airspace by Singapore’s air force.

The first option was to proceed with negotiations to reach a deal with mutual benefits.

Based on Singapore’s immediate needs, Fuzi said, Malaysia would have had to lift the ban on the export of sand and reinstate the use of Malaysian airspace.

But public opinion in Malaysia indicated these concessions were seen as giving away too much in exchange for a new bridge.

The second option was to proceed with a scenic half-bridge within Malaysia, that would join the Singapore’s half part of the 80-year-old Causeway. But this required getting consulting Singapore’s to get its approval to relocate water pipelines, which could lead to a request for a balance of benefits.

Option three was to unilaterally build a half-bridge that could eventually be linked to become a full scenic bridge with Singapore. But this would have resulted in endless political bickering and legal wrangle.

The fourth option — not to proceed with a new bridge — was the Government’s best choice after much deliberation. ~~~~~~~ reported the NST.

The
Govt's
reply


"We are surprised at
the views expressed by Dr
Mahathir. The Government
halted negiotiations
on the bridge because
selling sand to Singapore
is not acceptable to the
Malaysian policy,"
a
Government source told
Bernama, referring to
Dr Mahathir's claim that
the Governmnet's priority
was to sell sand to Singapore.

And we will continue to hear the haunting strains of
"And my heart will go on and on ..."


BLEEDING, ANYONE?

DESI's ERRATA, wont to committing nowadays, Ah NostalgiA!

So I checked and Yes, To Err Is Human...so some background to showthat you also don't know some, what!

"Googled:~~~~~~~"

Single by Céline Dion

"My Heart Will Go On" is the theme song of the highly popular 1997 film Titanic. Originally released in 1997 on Céline Dion's album Let's Talk About Love, it went to number one in several countries including the United States, United Kingdom, Canada, and Australia. It stayed at this position for two weeks in each of the aforementioned countries.

The song was written by Will Jennings and James Horner. Although James Cameron, the director of Titanic, did not want a song played over the end credits of the film, Jennings and Horner went ahead and recorded the song with Céline Dion regardless. It is said that Cameron was so taken with Dion's voice that he changed his mind about the song and indeed, the song does play over the end credits.

Dion has admitted that when she first heard the song, she didn't want to record it. It was her manager and husband, René Angélil, who convinced her to record it. Also notable is that the song heard on the radio and in Dion's albums was sung only one time. Even more incredible was that Dion recorded the entire song without the music. Horner, Dion and Sony Music decided to keep the first recording as the official song because "Dion's voice was perfect".

Thursday, April 27, 2006

Smart-assed MP and A-Class ShahriZAT

Lately a certain FAshionistA has been giving tips to my ER -- especially remnants of MCP! and IF you have to ask desi what MCP is, get out of here! --how to keep abreast with the trends in A-ttire,A-ttitude and Altitude.

Let Desi explain because FashionAsia may protesteh that this Blogger puts words into her mouth -- which is not big, just pear-ly, my educated Guess, which is also one of her brands though I'm still awaiting mGf to gift me as a Nut! -- lest she lend weight to Shakespeare's words to the effect: Woman, thou protesteth too much!" which also requires some feedback -- quote for this lazy scribe where this came from, context too (like a Literature test!:)

Hello there, SH Tan, from Penang, have thee verified this?

Back to my post title, you'd have guess'd!

Frontpage of theSUN which shines brightly on the Gems, exposes the asses of the Coals:

MP'S
INSULT ON
SINGLE
MUMS
AROUSES
ANGER

Backlash
over 'gatal'


KUALA LUMPUR: Claws were unsheathed in the Dewan Rakyat today (April 26, 2006) when a PAS member made an unkind remark about single mothers.

All women MPs from both sides of the divide stood up in consternation when Abdul Fatah Harun (Rantau Panjang) claimed most single mothers, with the exception of widows, were divorced because they were "gatal" (flirtatious).

Taking the lead was Women, Family and Community Development Minister Datuk Seri Shahrizat Abdul Jalil. Her male counterparts joined in the chorus of protest.

For 10 minutes, they verbally "abused" Abdul Fatah, demanding that he withdraw the statement.

But all they got from Abdul Fatah was: "I withdraw the word 'gatal' but maintain that what I said is a fact."

Shahrizat said Abdul Fatah's remark insulted all single-mothers and such a claim can only be made by one who does not have faith in God.

Winding up the debates on the 9th Malaysia Plan for her ministry, she said there are many reasons for a divorce, including misunderstanding, financial problems and in-laws.

Datuk Abdul Ghapur Salleh (BN-Kalabakan) said the word "gatal" is unparliamentary and rude while Lim Bee Kau (BN-Padang Serai) said Abdul Fatah must be strongly objected because he has malicious intent.

However, Abdul Fatah refused to retract initially because he did not have any bad intention towards anybody as his statement was a fact and "gatal" is the most accurate word to describe the women he referred to.

To make matters worse, Deputy Speaker Datuk Lim Si Cheng, who tried hard to contain the situation, said he could not ask Abdul Fatah to withdraw his statement because he was not around when the claim was first made.

He then told Abdul Fatah to explain what he meant and on hearing his explanation, agreed the word was inappropriate and asked for a retraction.

However, at that time, the House was already chaotic with shouts from the MPs.

Idris Haron (BN-Tangga Batu) even asked for an adjournment for the issue to be discussed at length but Lim said it was not necessary.

Lim took some time ordering all of them to be seated and finally Abdul Fatah said he withdrew the word "gatal" but maintained what he said was a fact.

However, Shahrizat had the last say. She warned Abdul Fatah: "Next time, do not ever use the word 'gatal' again to refer to women!"

Later, when Ismail Noh (PAS-Pasir Mas) suggested the khutbah Jumaat address the issue of single mothers, Shahrizat said she felt relieved not all Kelantan men share Abdul Fatah's mind.

"Otherwise, it would be very unfortunate for those married to Kelantan men. Actually I married one of them too but perhaps, those on this side (pro-government) are not like that," she added.


Desiderata:


A-TTITUDE


Fact: Sharizat has more balls than many of her male counterparts in RUMAHsakitsikitParliamen, be it from UMNO or PAS --(pause) any from MCP? You tell me.

Fiction: Most single mothers, with the exception of widows, were divorced because they were 'gatal' (flirtations)
Counterpoint (yet to be confirmed Fact or Fiction): More likely the trigger is that "The amorous men allowed to have more than one wife likely to seek Amore, leaving the first wife alone at home, and their 'gatal" fingers roaming all over another woman's landscape, oh, bodyEscape!"


A-LTITUDE

Fact: When the culprit MP said:"I withdraw the word 'gatal' but maintain that what I said is a fact." is NOT an apology but a re-affirmatuion he is a smart-asshole.

Fiction:That Malaysians in general have high esteem of the august House. No, most constituents have higher respect for those furry residents at that place they call Zoo Negara in nearby off Jalan Klang Lama, Selangor.

MENTAL A-TTIRE:

FAshionistA A-Class ShariZAT, especially your final punch to the belt, not above or below, just level! Quote:

She warned Abdul Fatah: "Next time, do not ever use the word 'gatal' again to refer to women!"


PHYSICAL A-TTIRE

Learning from international nu'e
changing fashion capital
of emerging worlde ~~~~~~~
Peking to Beijing!

Tue Apr 25, 8:21 AM ET


BEIJING
(Reuters) - Bra producers have been forced to offer bigger cup-sizes in China because improved nutrition is busting all previous chest measurement records.

"It's so different from the past when most young women would wear A- or B-cup bras," Triumph brand saleswoman Zhang Jing told the Shanghai Daily from the Landmark Plaza of China's commercial hub.

"You...never expect those thin women to have such nice figures if they are not plastic."

The report, seen on the daily's Web site Tuesday, said that the Hong Kong-based lingerie firm Embry Group no longer produces A-cups for larger chest circumferences and has increased production of C-, D- and E-cup bras to meet pressing demand.

The Beijing Institute of Clothing Technology released a report last week saying the average chest circumference of Chinese women has risen by nearly 1 cm (0.4 inch) to 83.53 cm (32.89 inches) since the early 1990s, the daily said.

This phenomenon, it said, was due to women eating more nutritiously and taking part in more sport.

Similar growth in the average height of children prompted a rethink last year in Beijing on the height allowance for free bus rides. (Reuters)


FAshionistA at her blog @fashionasia.blogspot.com has posted on hair-care, ladies' shoes, high or lo-heels, even kills, also men's attitude to women, hi- or lo-altitude like "OkayOrKnot making the first move, male on femail, or vice versa...")...
Okay, go see for yourself -- FEAST THY EYES ON:LY! DON'T TOUCH! ~~~ Ouch, Oouchh, OoouchhH!!! for the roving fingers, truly Getall MCA-aspirants.


Salute to non-MCP members from Desiderata:

Ignoramuses like Desi have ythe MISSconception before the free education generously handed out by FAshionistaS like ShariZAT dan FashionAsia that A-cup was the largest zize -- but the women of fesyen world from London to Milan to Gay Paree to Instanbul prefer to Go-stan in the Z to A style: C=cup is badder than A or B!

Can the dessicated one now have my miLO now, and some pastries2 puurpleAse,
FashionistA Helen mui-mui from Ipoh,
the fesyen capital sirpassing AllOfKoalaLumpuh,
PP. QQ. JB and Yes, Batam2!

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Swearing by VIPs...

VERY IMPORTANT PERSONS.

It's not the Swearing-In.

It's SWEARING, like using that F-word? No, not nyet. But yes, the F-sign that's Universal GreAting! By a state's CEO, no less. A mess? Good model for the Masses?

We are common citizen Jane or JoePublic. we also swear when caught in the tarffic jams. Yes, I do. For my own letting off steam. In public. Rare. Medium, Well done. That's thinking of my steaks. And Sunday's so far away. Damn, damn, damn! Three 4-letter s-words. Desi's knotty in deed this morning. Blame IT on the Young&Articulate on Blogosphere, who also taught me WTF with an ass, then Lol, some times with, some times minus, the Ass. I still cunt figure out that Interjection expressing Self-induced Exhilaration, or isIT Masochistic Ecstasy? Wella, watever!
To each his own. I did not include "her" as wella because come to think of it, women/ladies today behave as bold as men. They do swear! Lol!

It's about time we have our First Lady Premier.
Rafidah Aziz?
Da AP-parition?Thie came up because many MPs, especially Da Oppo Leader, have complained it's so rare of the miniSter APpearing at that RUMAHssParlimen that when she does, it's like an AP...apa agin?

Okay, where was Eye?
Oh yeah -- VIPs.
It's the Swearing by, I mean, I got It wrong the first time! -- VERY IMPRESSIVE PERSONS.

Who?


Menteri Besar of Pahang. DATUK SERI ADNAN YAAKOB.

Where?


At the State Assembly.

When?


On Monday, in giving Winding-up Speech.


How: Whispering, (or isit Whisping, my Engrung not so wella)Go To Hell!(in BM, "Pergi jahanam!")
DESIDERATA: I prefer IT in Bahasa Malaysia, so classic and colourfool, unlike the English equivalent, so straight and uninteresting, and un-cultured, if I may add. At least, when delivered in Bahasa, the target does not burn in the Hades. What a fate! Faith?



At?

At all of you people-lah (specifically Pahangites), You dummies, for putting me in office, again and again.
Yes, didn't you remember -- I showed thee the famous "V" sign at a bye-erection? Minus one finger, with the middle one still standing.
Again and again, you guys like to be CON-ned, (Helen mui-mui, isIT corner-ed, like Jack Horner...) -- are you people suffering from some sort of MAcho...(I forgot Engrish word! Mayhaps, helen can help out. Nowadays she uses BIG words! Sked Desi-wan.)


PS to ahli-ahli terhangat di RUMAHssParlimen: Don't mix up The Hades with The Hague. If you need more education, read The Pilgrim's Progress, by John Milton.
I hear Howsy whispering from lundun: Don't throw pearls at da swine!Knotty, knotty! - my compadre Josey.

From page 1, theSUN -- Okay, bringing you the nu'es of Da Dey!


MB defends outburst


KUANTAN:
Pahang Mentri Besar Datuk Seri Adnan Yaakob, who lost his cool and told a newspaper to "go to hell" at a State Assembly sitting on Monday (April 24, 2006), today (April 25) explained that he did so to defend his rights.

He said a report in Utusan Malaysia's April 22, 2006, edition on his comments on logging angered him so much that he uttered the words "pergi jahanam" or "go to hell".

He said the report was written in such a way that made it look as if he was giving an ultimatum to Prime Minister Datuk Seri Abdullah Ahmad Badawi to give the state RM150 million to RM200 million a year to stop logging in the state.

He said this in a press conference attended only by Bernama, RTM and TV3 at Wisma Sri Pahang here. It is believed other media representatives were not invited.

Adnan said the report offended him as a phrase that was in inverted commas, normally done to denote a direct quote, was not what he had actually said.

"This aroused anger in me. I was thinking what the agenda was. That was why I used the words 'go to hell' with the permission of the Speaker."

"Why is it that in my eighth year as Mentri Besar, this is the first time I am using these words?

"Going by past record, Utusan Malaysia has something against me. From when I became Mentri Besar until now.

"What's the meaning of this? Pahang Umno has shares in Utusan Malaysia but we never used our power to control," said Adnan.

He said the mass media has the right to criticise and reprimand but based on accurate reporting.

"I have also said this before, we must be criticised, if not the officials, Exco members, wakil rakyat or Mentri Besar may abuse their powers.

"We welcome criticism but reports like this which are not accurate and which can cause the prime minister to have a wrong perception about me, I cannot remain silent."

"I am a normal human being. If portrayed as not loyal to the Prime Minister, that makes me angry," he said.

Adnan said he is considering legal action against the newspaper.


DESIDERATA:

First it was former Prime Minister Tun Dr Mahathir Mohamad who loudly complained that the local media were "blacking out" his views on Da Bridge, straight, crooked, there, here, everywhere and leading to Nowhere.
Now a Menteri Besar.
But the Opposition leaders have always been pointing fingers, and whispering 4-letter words under their breath! I know -- I som,etimes stand within hearing distance! But that's another cerita-lah, over RTElm? mayhaps. Miss/Mr/ Saudara/ri, Patience?

From another BN leader, A BASIC LESSON ON MEDIA, Mess Communications -- Ooops, Merci! fishtail, Mass Comm 101?

From The Star, page 6,


Wednesday April 26, 2006


Najib: Be responsible

KUALA LUMPUR: Deputy Prime Minister Datuk Seri Najib Tun Razak has reminded the media not to view freedom of the media and freedom of information as a carte blanche to publish, print and disseminate information that would lead to unrest and upheaval.

This, he said, was particularly important in Malaysia and other countries with a similar multi-racial and multi-religious society.


“Freedom unfettered by responsibility is in fact not freedom but anarchy. Publications must be responsible enough to ensure that what they publish will not aggrieve any section of society,” he said in his keynote address at the Publish Asia 2006 Conference at Shangri-La Hotel here yesterday.

“They must be careful not to ignite the flames of hatred and resentment, and they must be careful not to knowingly publish what is certain to incite anger and violence.”

However, Najib said he was not suggesting that publications should be tame and mundane, not encourage debate and discussion, and not criticise the authorities or the Government.

Constructive criticism, he said, was always a good thing as long as it is meant to induce progress and improvements, and not imparted for the sake of sensationalism.

DESIDERATA: I am not reproducing the rest of te report because even giving the first six paragraphs of the report, I have abetted in "insulkting" the intelligence of the readers.

It's all cliche and "crap", if I may indulege in some undiplomatic speak because I get very passionate on any discourse regarding the Fourth Estate.

To a journalist like me, the first three paragraphs are mere mouthings of things any eduacted reader would have assumed as premises without any leader having to say it, again and again, as these are clever and original thoughts.
Journalism 101 goes deeper than understanding such inane assumptions.

On discussing THE MEDIA, the DPM never did refer to the sad state of affairs of the Press today -- I have used the term "compliant and self-servin and self-censoring" press as far as the English mainstream papers are concerned. In fact, the newspapers always take signals from their political masters -- so people like Adnan and Najib should not be critical of the media today.

Even the good Doctor Tun Mahathir, for he's now getting a taste of his own medicine. Belatedly no doubt, but just as bitter, I believe.

In fact, what Dr Mahathir has done the Malaysian Fourth Estate a big service is opening up the field of discourse. He asked questions of national projects and issues like any Citizen JoePublic, but because he is a fromer PM, he gets more space than any ordinary man-in-the-stree like Desi could ever dream of.

Like again today, the Star and theSun respectively both reported on "Dr M issues six-page open letter on scrapped bridge" with advised link to the full text at www.thestar.com.my -
and "Dr M sends open letter on bridge" (with a link to www.jpn.gov.com advising on more Bridge issues).

The Sun recently did away with its Weekender.
The Sunday Mail sang its Swan Song April 23, 2006 -- how many of my dear ER know that? Hey, feedback me, Cuntfession Time. Desi player Father Mildread!

Do you see the trend?
The advent of the Internet -- spelling gloom and doom for mainstream print media everywhere, from the United States of America, Great Britain to yes, Malaysia. But our leaders still have eys, but do not drink Eye-See!(THat's the latest carbionated drink See Fei and I have concoted, hitting the supermart furthest you come Chirstmess Die!

Tell me -- what are you truest thoughts of Malaysian media today? Desi is feeling he's One-Eyed Jack nowadays, listening to a DPM lecturing us on Journalism 101 -- but omitting issues at the core of Malaysia's ills in progressing the 4th Estate, like the Official Secrets Act, The Printing Presses and Publications Act 1984, the I.S.A.men...

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Creatures Big and Small

There are two classes of poets - the poets by education and practice, these we respect; and poets by nature, these we love.~~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Page 1 of theSUN was smirking at Desi at the BF table this mourn,
maybe it's a Tuesday with Worries. Oh, not targeted at Malaysians like
Me. It's the Other Chinoserie Under Attack...

Snorers,
the skinny
and short
need not
apply to PLA


BEIJING: China's army recruiters can look
forward to a better night's sleep thanks
to a new regulation banning chronic
snorers from joining up.

One of a raft of physical and mental
traits banned from the army, the new
standards governing recruitment into
China's military schools also blacklist
drug-takers, tattoo-waerers and over-
weight applicants, newspapers
reported yesterday.

"Given that chronic snorers' sounds
disturb the life of others, a new
regulation ... has been added," the
Beijing Times quoted army official Li
Chunming as saying.

The Reuters reports adds that the hit-list bans the
short, the skinny and the fat. And applicants will
sit written psychological tests and their urine tested
for evidence of drug-taking.

The purpose is to bring modern recruitment procedures
tailored to the new youth of today's society.

To commemorate the new freedoms to creatures banned
for certain reasons of their anatomy BIG or small,
Desi lends his weight to the nifty situation at
the weighing-in ceremony:

Fat people are not welcome


I read the news in dismay
It's alright, fat people do have their day
The army says I'm exempt from recruitment
"Your weight is a deterrent!"


Unless you are less than 170 pounds
And can under 10 minutes do 15 rounds
And then skip for a hundred
Followed by 10 push-ups and
Last one punch-up with captain Mildread


It's okay, I'd rather be fat
Earning my mates laughs and scorn
The Commander says I can go home now
To all thee hunks,
I give my lowest fare-thee-well Bow.
I'm good for ever and now.
Back to Mama's kitchen
Instead of bullets and handguns
I have oh, so tasty, all sorts of buns
On peanut buttered bread I chow
Endlesly.
Famously.
Deadly.


So be it
At least I die at home
Where I'm welcome
.

Monday, April 24, 2006

bluesy monday in verse

bluesy monday has arrived
and I've nothing solid to show
money's come, but pleasure is hardly derived
like my neighbours, i'be bound to my row


of seeking dollars more than a dime
so i can drive and not have to climb
uphill to reach the sundry shop in such hot clime
actually it's my bruised ego, that's the real crime
that my neigbur drives a limo, versus old jalopy of mine


so lady time has crept another se7en days on me
do i postpone my precious quest for another time
i continue to drown in my sorrows, trying to catch
the luxuries of the se7en seas
but meanwhile, the sun, the moon and the stars
they all laugh at me, at me, but i do not see


DESIDERATA is going to immerse himself in poetry for the comiing weeks in the run-up to prepare himself in a publishing project. I find by fleshing out my thoughts in verse in doing the gretaest justice to oneself. It's not just seeking the reader's understanding -- it's more the writer seeking to see himself AS IS.

Human beings' greatest reluctance, in my humblest of opinions, (and that is me the writer speaking for himself, for none others) is to confron the REALITY that he is, warts and pimples, bloomingg assets and smooth skin, et al. I'll be damned if I do not also admit to such reluctance; hence the occasional escapades into composing poems to share.

My esteemed readers, my poetry need bout elicit a universal response. No, no. If the response is ame from eah and everyone of you, then I would have failed. For I would have been not much different from a salesman peddling the illicit VCD of Passion of Christ or Jet Li in Fearless. Pay less in deed! RM5 a copy -- and every buyer's response is the same: Value for money thought it be a COPY of Mel Gibson's original work. Sacrifice a little quality ne'er mind -- I only want RM5 worth for my money.

As a poet, I want to excite in my dear friends spending precious time reading me his/her unique response. How my writing strikes your emotional chords in your unique heartstrings.
Don't ask me what do I mean by such and such a verse.
I'm asking of you what does that verse strike you most?
In eleiciting an emotional response.
I want to know your feelings.
Through verse I have rendered my feelings, innermost thoughts.
Baring myself -- yes, the Emperor does know his own vulnerability,
he's weakest in his naked glory.
Even a child can see through that.
It's the Adult, with all his thought drifting to material things --
worrying about the daily three meals,
the chikldren's eduactyion.
Yes, that holiday on SS VIRGO ON THE SE7EN SEAS.
The aduilt LOST on his own island,
or sold to the most foul of material world.

This morning I chanced on a fellow Blogger's "emailed"
nonsense verses, which elicited a similar nonsense response
yes, from Desi.
I guess, assume's the word, that Mental Jog @lucialai.org won't mind my reproducing
the said silly -- yet entertyaining, and teaching -- lines.

the new malaysian poem

"Posted in humour, CnP by Lucia on the April 24th, 2006

as monday is usually a blue monday to many since it is the start of a week… a long week of work work work… here’s a joke to cheer you guys up. received from forwarded mail."


Can study continue STUDY
Can’t study, work FACTORY
Cannot rely on CHARITY
Earn a little SALARY
Just enough 4 daily ROTI
Go work no WIRA but LRT.


Colleagues formerly FRIENDLY
Daily treated to KOPI
Now gradually get CRAZY
Behind me say I LAZY.


Boss has no SYMPATHY
Work always must HURRY
Say I not enough BUSY
Often ask me do OT

Midnight go back by TAXI
TAXI surcharge KILLING ME
Now i pokai and NO MORE MONEY

Borrow from chettia kena EXTRA FEE
Coz money is never FREE


Boy/girl-friend go STEADY
Serious, and then MARRY
Ceremony and PARTY
joker-friends give PANTY

No money sure no HONEY
10 months later be DADDY
Wife at GH birth a BABY
Monthly pay back RHB


Earn not enough FEEL GUILTY
Jump down suicide and MATI
No money 4 funeral how to BURY
Go see God every thing hoping will JADI
Because MALAYSIA BOLEH. SEMUA JADI.


One Response to 'the new malaysian poem'
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ylchong said,


on April 24th, 2006 at 10:56 am

i wake up feeling down
your poem adds to my frown
why go mati when malaysia
is land of milk and honey
when pokai go see your MP
failing witch see thy PM
He’ll surely offer thee tehsee
or capati or mamak mee
Or go-see taiko Ah Long
Borrow more, amore
Enuf to buy two coffins
One for Him and one for Thee


PS: Yes, monday blues
Can’t settle down to work
So UP to blog nonsense
Jest to get some syiok




NOW contrast the above with what follows -- extracts of two fellow movie fans' commentaries on a movie from my Goggling trail that ranks within Desi's list of must see; because my abiding poet William Wordsworth has had one of his immoral works immortalised there -- the strains (poetry is like music, yes?) keep bugging Desi because the verses somehow or other were strewn about my Hollywood Trail in some mystic connection which I have yet to fathom.
I will know, by 2010.
No, I can't wait till 2046!
So I seek my Reader's personal indulgence if I get a little selfish
in the coming weeks,
and Blog on personal things.
Funny things. Wicked things.
Nostalgia maybe.
Fun and frolic perhaps.
Insulting and ego-busting even, mayhaps.
But that's all fair in love and war. And writhings.


[1173] Splendour in the Grass

Date : 14 Feb 2003
1stLine: What though the radiance
Comment: by KassieB


Splendour in the Grass


What though the radiance
which was once so bright
Be now for ever taken from my sight,
Though nothing can bring back the hour
Of splendour in the grass,
of glory in the flower,
We will grieve not, rather find
Strength in what remains behind;
In the primal sympathy
Which having been must ever be;
In the soothing thoughts that spring
Out of human suffering;
In the faith that looks through death,
In years that bring the philosophic mind.


-- William Wordsworth


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

William Wordsworth's 'Splendour in the Grass' is the poem we hear in the 1961
movie by the same name. Natalie Wood and Warren Beatty starred and Wood was
nominated for an Academy Award for her role as Deanie, Beatty's girlfriend.

The poem is from Intimations of Immortality from Recollections of Early
Childhood
, which begins with the majestic:

There was a time when meadow, grove, and stream,
The earth, and every common sight,
To me did seem
Apparelled in celestial light,
The glory and the freshness of a dream.


The entire ode is well worth reading.

My first introduction to Splendour in the Grass was on a day when I was home
from school, sick with the flu. I passed the day watching movies on the
television. Though I was only about eleven or twelve years old, the poem
really resonated. And who can forget Natalie Wood struggling to read it in
her English class, then hearing her recite it again, this time much wiser,
at the end of the movie?

Kassie


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The seocnd's from: "Anustup Datta"

The poem more or less summarises Wordsworth's poetic philosophy. He once
described poetry as "emotion recollected in tranquility" - his best poetry
has the poet-philosopher lying on his couch "in vacant or in pensive mood",
remembering a flash of beauty in Nature or Man. As his "inward eye"
diminished in power with age, his poetry too lost its power. Unlike other
poets - such as a Browning, for instance - his power of observation did not
mature with age, nor take on deeper and subtler overtones mellowed by
experience and understanding. Ultimately, the fount of stored memory and
captured emotion ran dry without anything to replenish it with. As a famous
critic observed, Wordsworth "lived on capital" - profligately.


I have always thought that Wordsworth at his best was the greatest poetic
Impressionist - his eye captures the fleeting moment in the same dazzling
interplay of light as Claude Monet's
watercolours. And you know what Cezannesaid about Monet - "Only an eye, but my God what an eye!" Like Monet,Wordsworth remained the truest to the absolute fidelity of emotional impression.

Wordsworth himself realizes what he has lost through the passage of time,
and his reaffirmation of faith here sounds hollow and forced, as though he
were trying to convince himself that all is not gone. But try as he might, a
touch of nostalgia about the glory that was, of the splendours of the past,
creeps in. The grass remains splendid, but the keen-eyed young man who had
felt it earlier is no more.
"


DESIDERATA:

Many of us wish there were more than 24 in a day, don't we?
It's a mad rush here, a mad dash there,
and at the end of the day
we mourn, we have not done the more important things of the day.
And the cycle repeats itself.
I'm going to pause.
To lessen the moans.
Then maybe, by End-September, I have something to show.
I must also keep my word.
I've to deliver some PRIZE!

Sunday, April 23, 2006

Running Still...Like a Child?

My thoughts running

A myriad thoughts flashing
no particular direction
some are crystal clear
most are blurred and confusing
'tis like a journey into unknown
sadness wells up when a familiar face appears
but all is lonely and questioning
among crowds of strange people
and nameless ones


I wake up in a daze
not knowing reality from a dream
what journey am I embarked on?
It's a journey running
Still.


The above poem was composed one afternonon quite long ago when I think my memory of
certain events was confused and unkind. Some of those incidents in life that one would, if one could, have liked to wish away.

On such misty modes when you can't see the surrouns clearly, and one loses directions in moving forward, that's the mood. I used the plural form of "direction" because at certain crossroads, one is tempted to try moving forward, then step backwards with uncertainty; try one direction. Often it's one step forward, two steps backward. It's akin to a situation like a child left in a strange shopping mall, he wants to break down and cry. Because Mama and Papa - who represented familiarity and certainly - had wandered off. But when you're adult and face a similar landscape, you can't cry for Mama. And if you can't cry aloud for friends, then you're in a troubled state.

I did not get advice that by right I should just wander of for a break. Take a long holiday -- just be responsible to oneself. I realised I have had often taken too much responsibility on my shoulders. That realisation dawned after you saw throgh the facades of people -- "actors" so aptly described by Shakespeare in "As You Like It". By nature, I believe as a writer I take on the role of a Mentor to try to steer people (YoungOnes?) after us to avoid some of the mistakes we encountered. But sometimes certain lessons could not be shared, they had to be personally felt to make an impression.

Poets share their innermost emotions through verses. Essayists through their prose. Ideally one can write both so beautifully they two can entwine seamlessly so we cannot distinguish if it was Poetry or Prose. To the writer, it does not matter as long as his writing achieves its main purpose of entertaining the Reader, that the reader feels connected, indeed enters into the writer's world via words so powerful they paint pictures in the Reader's mind, and affects emotions in his breasts.

I wonder if my poem above connects with thee, my Esteemed Reader. I'm putting Reader in the "singular" because I'm asking of you personally, as you read me. I don't want you to be among an anonymous crowd.

This Sunday's INTER:LUDE explores some fellow poets' minds. And because I connect, I respond, almost spontaneously. Others I hold my thoughts, chew over the writer's creative work, later respond. Some works are so deep, Desi dared not respond -- just held his tongue lest he show himself a fool. But sometimes it's alright to be a fool -- aren't children like "fools" most times because they speak the unguarded truths? So it's alright to be childlike again when you reach 50, 60 or SE7ENTY like
Tun Dr Mahathir Mohamad. Have a sen-se of humour, or satire, whichever is thy forte.

"Be yourself."

One important compass point in my sifu Max EHRMANN's work, DESIDERATA.

I recently mused on a nutGIFT STOLEN from abekamal.wordpress.com, OR isIT a NutCASE? My dear EstemmedReaders, you tell Desi!

From a blog named deliberately named for a reason:go and die

"I’m searching for the words inside my head. I stutter, I stumble, like I’ve got nothing to say"

The naughty lad told his story in verse:
I'm re-versing since I got no permit to reproduce his curse.


The naughty lad is woken up by a bird chirping on his window sill
No appreciating of the creature's meldious wake-up call,
As he wants to sleep still
The crooked lad hammers the bird to send to Heaven's mall
Because he's not a morning person
"That will teach the bird a lesson!"



Posted in Fun |

ylchong Says:

April 12th, 2006 at 12:37 pm


A gal came along, kissed
that poor bird on the sill

so still
It slowly op'ned its eyes
Chirped: thank you, thank you
Say hello to that naughty boy
May his next life be one of a birdie
Suffer the same fate
But ony half dead…


I wonder how many of my ER today can recite this?

There was a crooked man and he walked a crooked mile,
He found a crooked sixpence upon a crooked stile.
He bought a crooked cat, which caught a crooked mouse.
And they all lived together in a little crooked house



So out of the kindness of my heart,to prevent early death,
Desiderata gives the young lad some advice, hope he gives me kindness back!



I pray Go and Die don't grow up to be crooked
Otherwise, you would have to inherit the crooked sixpense,
crooked cat, crooked mouse and a crooked PC
But what good is a crooked PC, unless you have a crooked I
BUT I'm so youbg still, I don't want also to Go and Die.


The above are just spontaneous responses to some silly rhymes,
But they can prove challenging. Self entertaining too! (Some mGf say: Syiok sendiri!)

I read and enjoyed poems by K.L. TEO, a favourite Singaporean poet of Joe.Psc, who ran one again on April 19, 2006 called
AMOK.

I'm awaiting Joe's permission to reproduce the poem before it runs away elsewhere to kick up a ruckus. Romp? Pomp!

Meanwhile, care to seek Desi out in the Fu Rong Maze to have CON BF at about 10AM tomorrow? NO, it's today, as we are an hour into Sundae, o'lady!



UPDATE @12.20PM,
After CON BF with past DPM ~~~~~~~~


With Joe's permit in hand,
Desi steals the NUTgift from sin-land ~~~~~~~~
Flying above the crooked bridGe
I see no scene, just a pretty bride on a ridge.


Wednesday, April 19, 2006

AMOK
by K L TEO


In a peaceful kampong suggling
In a palm grove by the sea
Lived a young man named Wan Puteh,
Handsome, friendly and full of glee.


And Wan Puteh was betrothed
To a kampong damsel fair
Who was known as sweet Salomah
And acclaimed for her beauty rare.

And Wan Puteh loved Salomah
More than anything on earth;
And the thought he was betrothed
Filled his heart with joy and mirth.

Now at length his waiting was over,
For tonight she was his spouse;
And the ronggeng drum was throbbing
Merrily outside his house.

And the kampong folk had gathered
In their gayest for a feast -
Women in selendang looked coy and modest,
Men in tanjak, smart and pleased.

Said Wan Puteh to Salomah
With a tender look of love,
"You are beautiful, Salomah,
Like the moon that shines above.

"I shall ever be so happy
With a lovely spouse like you;
I shall ever love you dearly,
And to you shall ever be true..."

Looking into his eyes, she answered
In a voice he loved to hear,
"I am now your bride, Wan Puteh,
Just to please my father dear."

And she saw the love-light fading
From the eyes of her bridegroom,
And his fingers gripping the handle
Of his kris as he left the room.

Crazed with sudden hate and vengeance,
He approached a wedding guest,
And without a sound or warning
Plunged his kris into his breast.

The he swiftly stabbed another,
And as swiftly stabbed a third,
"Amok! Amok! cried his father,
Dying without another word.

Women shrieked and fled in terror
As the cry of amok spread;
But their men unsheathed their krises
Lest another victim bled.

And they rushed at young Wan Puteh
As they would to meet a foe;
And they shouted, "Kill him! Kill him!"
Striking many a deadly blow.

For Wan Puteh was an amok -
Even his father couldn't deny -
And it was their law unwritten
That an amok needs must die.


And Wan Puteh died that evening
With his usual smile of glee
In that peaceful kampong snuggling
In a palm grove by the sea.


K L TEO(c)

Friday, April 21, 2006

Heed the BEFRIENDERS' call...

For those people with problems they almost can't bear,
LOOK BEFORE YOU LEAP!
There is A HELPING HAND OUT THERE.
CALL DA BEFRIENDERS @Kuala Lumpur (03-79568144, 24 hours).

DESI'S PLACE has run several pieces advisinmg about HELPLINES;
I do it again in view of the following news item,
becoming quite common in this modern, stressful living world.


From The Star, page 3:
Friday April 21, 2006


Woman on ledge causes stir at Puduraya


KUALA LUMPUR: A woman in her 50s caused a stir and brought the already chaotic traffic in Jalan Pudu to a near halt when she attempted to jump off the rooftop of the Puduraya bus terminal.

However, the woman gave up when her daughter, son and members of the Rapid Intervention Motorcycles from the fire and rescue department coaxed her against jumping at about 2.30pm.


Use thy imagination to VISUAKLISE-lah! A LIFE AT STAKE: Rescuers and the woman’s children calming her down as she sat on a ledge at the sixth floor of the Puduraya bus terminal.
The woman had been sitting on the ledge of the six-storey building for about 90 minutes.


Taxi driver Azhman Abdullah, 48, said he was walking around the bus station on the ground floor when, suddenly, a handbag dropped in front of him.

“I looked up and saw a woman sitting on the rooftop. I panicked and immediately contacted the security guards who then alerted the fire department and the police,” said Azhman.

About 30 minutes later, a secondary schoolgirl, still in her school uniform, was spotted walking towards the scene with an unidentified man.

It is learnt that police, upon the woman’s request, had brought the girl to the scene.

A spokesman for Befrienders urged anyone with problems to call them and not resort to extreme measures.

“Anyone going through a rough patch can always call us. We are just a phone call away,” the spokesman said.

“Our volunteers are all trained to listen, and all calls are confidential.”

Befrienders has four centres:
Malacca 06-2842500 from 7pm to (midnight),
Ipoh (05-5477933/55 from 4pm to midnight),
Penang (04-2815161/ 1108 from 5pm to 11pm daily);

and Kuala Lumpur (03-79568144, 24 hours).

Politicians Who Want No Carrots...

The nick given to Malaysian Politicians is POLITIKUS.

Desiderata, trained by mGfNicole Kidman -- Interpreter at the UNITED NASIONES -- interprets that as a Combo - combination of two or more words to create a Nu'e Word - POLISHING APPLE + *RAT,
*Tikus is Rat in Bahasa Malaysia.


So it's not surprising that the Survey showed that Malaysians don't care too hoots about trusting their Politicians.
Apple-Polishing = Carrying balls
Ratty, as IN THE CASE of someone you won't trust with a SIN-gle sen.

Many of them therefore maketh poor role models for the CIVIL SERVANTS. Hence the Rakyat, JoePublic like you and me, can empathise with MP for Johor Bahru, when he more or less zeroed in on the problem affecting our CIVIL SERVICE.

I have written that these Civil Servants are anything but Civil.
Add now that most of them think the Public -- Joe&Jane --are their SERVANTS.

Desiderata says these Civil Servants and Poltitikus maketh very good gnipeelSPartners.

Waiting for Durian Runtuh = Expect rewards in the form of Carrots before doing anything, including carrying out their Duties to the Rakyat.

from TheMalayMail, April 20, 2006:

Cut the carrot and give them the stick

YESTERDAY marked the pinnacle of a two-day civil service-bashing when the Barisan Nasional Backbenchers Club chief called for the country’s civil service to be as ‘youthful’ as a teenager to make it easier to reform and reshape it.

BN Johor Baru member Datuk Shahrir Abdul Samad said it was time for it to crack down on non-performers.

During the debate on the 9th Malaysia Plan, Shahrir, who is also the Public Accounts Committee chairman, called for better implementation of the ‘carrot-and-stick’ system for civil servants.

“Currently, it seems more carrots are being dished out while the stick is not being wielded at all.”

He said it was time to get tough with non-performers and those with disciplinary problems.

“The most they face now is being transferred to another agency or department.”

He said the current set-up is such that the civil service and its personnel are reluctant to act against their own.

“This being the situation, there is no fear among them, even when they do not do any work.”

He said that against the current backdrop of public dissatisfaction with the service there was a desperate need for a total revamp.

“If Prime Minister Datuk Seri Abdullah Ahmad Badawi’s drive to create an enhanced and efficient public delivery system is to succeed, there is a need for a major revamp.”

Giving an example, Shahrir said one of his constituents had written to the Malaysian Companies Commission several times but never got a reply.

“He had written about seven letters over a period of 12 months. He did not get a single reply for his efforts.”


He said the kind of treatment received by the complainant was against the Prime Minister’s directive to improve and enhance the country’s delivery system.

“There is a need for a ‘proses keremajaan’ (teenage process) to take place in the public service.”

He said a more youthful public service would make it easier to reform and reshape it.


DESIDERATA: I like Sharir. He plays politics of PRINCIPLES.
Even before the Government decided to cancel the Crooked BridGe project, Sharir had joined many JoePubklic's Voices in calling for the project to be scrapped. How APt, or APpropiate! -- turning the project metal into scrap, and APpropriate the fun-Ds for some other bridges like the delapidated, holey and rickety bridges in the kampong and villages -- remmeber Sabah and Sarawak kids crossing snaky, swinging bridges everyday risking their lives going to-and-from school? Howsy knows the situation very wella, se som,e pix at his place (Howsy.blogpsot.com) -- I can't or rather won't, (some say they are wont to, but that's their business, and Desi ain't no noseybody, though I'm running some PHGLEM after ketching dat cough and cold from FAshionAsia dan THeels...) reproduce them here as I'm strictly an obserser of CopyRights Law although I hail from the KopiLeft Party.

WORD OF ADVICE TO PAK LAH:

(I think I can as a Journalist, who is more trustworthy than a politrician in the eyes -- aye, aye! -- of the Malaysian Public! JUST AS Matythias can advise Syed Hamid to resign his Cabuinet position of Foreign Minister, speaking on behalf of former PM Tun Dr Mahathir Mohamad though he said it's his right as a Citizen. I actually also speak on behalf of my many ER here but shy-lah to vocalise IT; otherwise I get some pies or pastries thrown at MY FACE by sisters Helen, Howsy and many many IpohLang. Desi's a cow-heard sometimes...Remember, Cybill Shep... "Oh, ShutUP!" I ear some1 whsiper, o'lady:)O. The O stands for some1's BIG Mouth, not Mouse!

Thursday, April 20, 2006

A NU'E BRIDGE TAEL

Hi, my Esteemed Coders and Decoders, pleAse go back to Yesterdie's Post and give the ANSWERS to the TWO CHALLENGIA. It's just, NOT FAIR< that the hoRst puts on his thinking cap until it leaks and there was jest one Fit-for-Frontpage response. Please three claps -- not crab or crap, See Fei cuntverts like Heln! -- for sisdar Twisted Heels who flu all D'SinniS Way from lundun to FuRong to try the Siew Pau on par with Helen's Cu't&Paste(ry) and down Da Desi's Bridge CODE-ine becos she's D'Flew, turning her face all blew...


DESIDERATA is most times a WRIThER, sometimes a POLITICIAN.
See the reason why in the following nu'es item, and IF YOIU HAVE TO ASK DESI FOR DA RATIONALE, then you are not mGf! No, not Nyet!

~~~~~~~~
From the Star
Wednesday April 19, 2006

People trust docs, teachers

PETALING JAYA: Who do Malaysians trust most? Politicians, business leaders, teachers or doctors?

In a survey of 2,074 respondents conducted by the Business Ethics Institute of Malaysia (BEIM), doctors came up first and teachers second. Politicians were at the bottom of the 15-category list.
Sixty-two percent of the respondents felt that politicians did not tell the truth, while believers numbered only 11%. The rest were uncertain.

The reading for business leaders was not good either, as they were just one rung above politicians.


“Interestingly, there appears to be some identical findings to the British (MORI) survey in the rankings,” said BEIM chairman Dr Zainal Abidin Abdul Majid yesterday.

BEIM conducted the survey to gauge the perception of trust among Malaysians in the integrity of several professions, and also to compare findings with a similar research conducted in Britain by MORI, an opinion research organisation.

Dr Zainal said the MORI survey was done here for the first time after the research director of the Institute of Business Ethics UK mooted the idea during a lecture visit to Malaysia in July 2004.

“In Britain it has been done annually since 1983,” he said, adding that it cost BEIM RM20,000 to conduct the survey.

“The respondents were from 28 organisations, including four government departments,” he said, adding that the University of Nottingham Malaysia and Binary University College helped to collate the results.

“The survey findings is a wake-up call to various parties. These are indicators that our level of integrity is very low and drastic changes have to be made,” he said, adding that the business community must realise that with a high level of integrity the country would be able to attract better investors.

He said it warranted a further investigation into the reasons for Malaysians’ lack of trust in the business leadership.

“The findings should be of concern to the business community, which has been rated second lowest with a score of 16% of trust.”

The integrity of business leaders is obviously at stake, which would affect the public’s and investors’ trust in the way we do business, he said.

Marked differences in the scores between the BEIM and the MORI surveys appear for trade union officials, police and civil servants, with the indication of trust higher in Britain.

It is worth noting that 30% of the respondents believe that the local press tell the truth, while in Britain it is 24%.

Overall, one can conclude that Malaysians are generally less trusting than the Brits.
~~~~~~~~


BUTT Desiderata sometimes has to defend the nation's honour, so when he was selected to reprsent Malaysia-eh to take part in an All-ASEAN Cuntestfor winning an I-LAND under an international dispute, Desi earnestly responded to join Da Quest.

The Sultan of that I-LAND said he has got fed-up of governing his kingdom of 1,001 citizens, comprising 500 males and 501 females, including his lovely, only daughter named Watelse, PRINCESS, who is the Apple of His-I.

The I-LAND is located off the South-North-East-West China Sea, and the United Nasiones has failed to settle the ownership problem because all 10 ASEAN Cuntries claim their unique Honorship. It's ezt to judge a two-country claim like that for Pulau Batu Putih ...but that's H2O Under The Bridge.

Da I-LAND CUNTEST requires the representatives to GIFT THE SULTAN WITH THE BEST DESIGN FOR A BRIDGE TO LINK THE I-LAND TO THE Cuntestant's HOME-Cuntry.

DA PRIZE: Whoever wins will be given Da Princess hand in marriage to a man of the winner's choice, and the I-LAND given to Da Groom's country.


The contest starts:
*Singapore presents a Bridge Model all in shining 18-carat GOLD!
*Indonesia presents a Bridge Model all in slivery 18-tael SILVER!
*Thailand presents a Bridge Model all in plateau mounted PLATINUM.


:
:
:

And the others follow, using the precious metals in the Periodic Table one by precious one...
Until it cometh Malaysia-eh's turn.

DESIDERATA
steps forward, he is the focus of all eyes in the Grand Ballroom, with of course, the Sultan's Cock-I, and my, MY, Da Princess' Helenic Pair of Jew'l'd I-I.


Out of the VIP Room steps the most gorgeous Beauty of Malaysia-eh,
Dressed in all her glory and naked purity in her -- Birddae's Sweeuit.
Except for s tring around her wasteline covering the most vital 'hole in the whole body.

A sight to behold.

The Sultan is be-witched.

Da Princess is be-mused.

All the Other9 Cuntestants are cuntfused.
"WHERE IS THE BRIDGE?" they cry out with one unanymous chorus.

"YES,WHERE'S DA BRIDGE?"echose the Sultan, smirking and salivating at Da Wondrous Sight.

Desi's humble response that resounds throughtout the Grand Ballroom like the Sweetest Sound All Malaysia-ehians Have Had Ever Heard (carried LIVE, off course, by the Most Reliable and Uncensored RTMElm!:

"I present to Your Most Excellency, Sultan of Da I-LAND, which I hole in the Hi-est 'Steam, my Gift of our nation's pride - A BRIDE with a G-string, ~~~~~~~ Da BridGe."~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~

The Sultan unanimously voted in my favour, of course.
But before Desi could claim Da Princess' Hand,
The Sultan proclaims: The winner must take DA DURIAN TEST...


Saddest words: Da End (Wan...Akhir)


UPDATED @ 10AM, Fridae,April 21, 2006
Day of Loving & Gifting, 'Cos one Y&A dared arsk for IT!
What is Da Durian Test?

from "APPLE & DURIAN POLISHING", March 28, 2006

DESIDERATA does not blame THeels -- she eats An Apple a Day -- London or Washington -- to keep Dr Chua away. Back home, in Malaysia for less-than-wella-informed Ignoramuses like Theels and Howsy, we poor Rakyat believe in eating Durian to keep away Dr Senility. We're leaving the Apples to be Polished -- by POLI-ticians!Hence, they rank the Hi!-est of the people some Malaysians TRUST THE MOST!

Reprise partially~~~~~~~~

Now see if you can discern any connection with the Durian story of survival with the currenty goings-on in Sarawak, where an Eastern Sun has just risen -- and soon it will be that MAD SEASON AGAIN.

State Elections.

Dear ER, Wait patiently for LAST as BreAkFast Dessert is
A Poem DedicAted to Sarawak Tribune Journalists
and
Blogger friends in the State where I always arsk one Oz-returnee blogger
Y&A always surropunded by dames who want to look at his balls
he'rsay of the size of DURIANS or COCO-nuts!:

KenORKnot?


Meanwhile, for some delightful aside, let's adjourn to OUR I-LAND akin to the blockbustier THE ISLAND, I hope my ER remember this is -- about a human clone colony where the inhabitants everyday try their luck at a lottery draw? The winners are then given a Dreanm Holiday supposed to enjoy at THE IDYLLIC ISLAND -- akin to Desi&G++ adventure on board the Super Virgo on the SE7EN SEAS.

But the TRUTH out there is they are clones who are being sent to the slaughter house -- where their "human" parts are harvested for use by their "masters/mistresses" who have ordered their birth as subsititute clones to expand and extend the live-spans of the humans...

It was reported
at one blogger's site during the December tsunami disaster, one country's LEADERS WERE STRANDED ON AN ISLAND< and they were rounded up by the natives headed by huge, gigantic, humougous man-like creature named ADA VERMIN. Does the nama ring a bell?

The four leaders -- each representing the sizeable ethnic groups of their country which was completely wiped out but the four survived because they took the only ship available -- wre told they might survive if they excelled in a test. The Fruit Test.

One by one the leaders were to go hunt in the jungle and return with five units of any fruit they think would appeace or please ADA VERMIN.

Number 4, representing the smallest ethnic ciommunity, was sent off first. He came back from the jungle with some red berries the size of kacang putih which were shown to the native head alone.
Number 4 was escorted into a cell, and there was a smile on his face when he emerged five minutes later. He performed well in the test.

The second leader was apprehensive when he went into the jungle, wondering if he should pick a big or small fruit. To play safe, he selected a medium sized fruit, like our rambutan. He also survived though he spent twice the time -- 10 minutes, in the cell, and the smile on his face was less jubilant.

Leader 3 was then sent off on his mission. Shaking his head again and again, he settled on some ripe mangoes.
His meeting with Ada Vermin in the cell lasted longer -- 20 minutes, and there was a small scream audible by the sole comrade waiting anxiously his turn. The third leader was led looking a little beaten -- yet thankful he was still alive -- to join the other triumphant two.

Finally it came the tunr of Taiko who served as Prime Monster for two decades, and what the citizens could do to persuade him to step down, the Gods intervened in the form of the Tsunami. The Rakyat did not survive to tell this story. The blogger found out after interviewing Ada Vermin just before the I-LAND's STATED ERECTIONS where the man with the longest lasting cock-stand became Head. Of course ADA VERMIN won all the time as his fellow citizens were dwarded down there although they were pretty great UP THERE. Which doesn't count.

So the Number 1 set off confidently into the jungle.
"I must take care of his balls, and give him the best fruit we know -- The King Of Fruits."

He thus came back with five durians and was walked to the cell.

There were screams heard throughout the I-LAND
as ADA VERMIN shuffed the durian, one by one, into Number 1's hole
WHERE THE SUN DON'T SHINE.

The four rounds of

s
c
r
e
A
m
I
N
G

!
lasted an hour,45 minues, 59 seconds -- still countING ...
One more round to go -- the 5th durian, remember?

s
c
r
e
A
:
:
:



So meanwhile, Ah, the local news item follows~~~~~~~~


Parties pledge all-round support for Taib's continued leadership

KUCHING: Political parties under the Barisan Nasional (BN) yesterday pledged their support and loyalty to Chief Minister Pehin Sri Abdul Taib Mahmud, calling on him to continue to spearhead Sarawak for many more years to come.

Parti Pesaka Bumiputera Bersatu Sarawak (PBB) deputy president Datuk Patinggi Tan Sri Alfred Jabu said Taib's leadership quality was so outstanding that he wished he could "clone Taib for posterity".

"We'll work very hard for the coming state election so that we'll not fail your vision for the State and the people," he said at a thanksgiving dinner held to mark Taib's silver anniversary as the chief minister at the State Legislative Assembly banquet hall here.

The BN component parties, comprising PBB, Sarawak United People's Party (SUPP), Sarawak Progressive Democratic Party (SPDP) and Parti Rakyat Sarawak (PRS), jointly organised the anniversary bash.

Jabu who is Deputy Chief Minister described Taib as the State's development architect for having transformed Sarawak from one of the undeveloped states in Malaysia into the top three most developed in 25 years.

He said he was confident that Taib had every Sarawakian's support because they knew that the Chief Minister was sincere in serving them.

"They've seen your achievement with their own eyes," he said, adding that there were only a small number of individuals whom he termed as "political tourists consisting of political rejects" as they only appeared during election time.

SUPP president and Deputy Chief Minister Datuk Patinggi Tan Sri Dr George Chan, meanwhile, said the party had never wavered from its staunch support for Taib.

"YAP Pehin Sri can be rest assured that when the chips are down, SUPP will be there," he said, stressing, "SUPP will always work very closely with all the BN component parties and is ever willing to do all it can to ensure that Sarawakians continue to live in unity, peace and happiness."

Dr Chan said Taib had always been very fair to all races in the State, placing strong emphasis on racial unity and harmony to ensure that peace would always prevail.

"It is his virtue in advocating a just and fair society that makes him the longest serving chief minister in this country," he pointed out.

With the state election drawing near, Dr Chan called on the people to reject opposition parties, saying that Peninsular-based opposition parties such as Parti Keadilan Rakyat and Democratic Action Party were out to introduce to Sarawak negative, destructive and provocative brand of politics which were unhealthy and detrimental to the State and its people.

Joining in the chorus of support for Taib, PRS president Dato Sri Dr James J Masing said Taib had brought unprecedented development, peace, stability and racial harmony second to none.

He said other states used to view Sarawak as a place full of jungles and animals, headhunters and even cannibals, a misperception that had changed "thanks to Taib's commitment in heightening the pace of development".

"Today we can hold our heads high as we walk among Malaysians," he said, adding, "PRS supports your leadership for many more years to come and we wish you the best of health."

Meanwhile, SPDP president Datuk William Mawan Ikom said leaders in the State looked up to Taib as a great leader, mentor, political father and friend whom they could always count on in good and bad times.

He pointed out that Taib's plural leadership and teamwork were hallmarks which had strengthened understanding and cooperation among leaders and members of the ruling coalition.

"To many of us, sir, you are a great friend indeed," he said, adding that Taib had guided and leaders of SPDP to become leaders with the courage and confidence ever ready to tread the path he had laid before them.

"Members of SPDP look forward to Pehin Sri's continued leadership," he added.



THY MIND IS ALSO MINE


Fools rush in where Angels like mGf dare not roam
And All Good Men never want to contest
Because there is just one party-one voice-one room
If you don't apple polish, you're under arrest


There are some Bloggers who like to dsiturb the hornets' nest
Shuffling the durian up Where The Sun Don't Shine
But don't write too much as it's best
This State is mine, the estate is mine

And hey Rakyat: thy mind is also mine!


PS:
Dearest THeels and Other ER, 'Cos you are such sporting visitors, I'm waiting PAtiently (I'm such an esteemed disciple of Hell minister Dr Chua!) for the ANSWERS from the two Objective Tests in WedNURSEdie's UPDATED Post. Leave the Durian Test till you come home to Malaysia-eh!

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

INVITE: Bloggers Ditties on Da Bridge (DIE 2)

At 5.15PM, Fridae April 21, 2006 came
DA ANSWERS!

When Desi searched American Heritage Dictionary,
I was surprised there is NO ENTRY for the word: PHLEGM!
I tried FLAM, te way the Americanoes like to simplify everything that Shakespeare and Desi hold sacred/secret, but it did not yield anything CLOSE to what I have in mind...

So UI itried the next best -
Dictionary.com,
and it's going to my First Point of Reference in future!
I'm gonna JUNK that Americano Dick!

Top Web Results for "phlegm"

Sinus Infection
Whooping Cough
Strep Throat
Chronic Cough
Post Nasal Drip

~~~~~~~~
5 entries found for

phlegm ( P ) Pronunciation Key (flm)
n.
Thick, sticky, stringy mucus secreted by the mucous membrane of the respiratory tract, as during a cold or other respiratory infection.

One of the four humors of ancient and medieval physiology, thought to cause sluggishness, apathy, and evenness of temper.
Sluggishness of temperament.
Calm self-possession; equanimity.

Desi hopes my ER have learnt a useful word today -- but I'm disappointed that
Helen mui-mui, despite being an Agatha Christie kaki, did not follow UP!
Another Da Desi Code fan, THeels, although she plays StalkHolmes -- not Shylock! -- she's bold enough to venture out despite a runny nose, Ahh Chooo!, This Y&A is still looking at the crystla-clear
WATER, Flowing Under The London BRIDgE!

So it's only FAshionistA who followed UP with SECOND CHANCE who is the sole winner. Come September, eh? for Da BridGe ChallengiA Prize! Now thy second nama is Miss Patience -- petite, virtuous, wise ...Rite, I heard thee, "Oh, why so cheong hei wan!"

FashionAsia, your point that that PHLEGM normally comes out of Da Mouth, not Mouse!, it sometimes does shoot out of the two tunnels under Da BridGe! especially when you blue a loud AaahhhH CHoooooOO!like what THeels did, so much so I heard her in Fu Rong and she's in Lundun!

Earlier, FAshionistA gave the answers to (1) and (2), and got it RIGHT for (2), with her Rationale as Good as Desi could give; viz--


Q1: 4 (ya its not H2O flowing down there, lotsa hard-hard stuffs too.)

Q2: 2 (bcos like a siamese twins its joint sidewways?)

By Fashionasia, at 9:49 AM


So mGf who took part,THANKS! Did you realise that your IQ quotient (I can tella!)
has gone up by a few notches; Does Da Desi Deacher Get a PRIZ(C)E?


UPDATE at 8.30PM, Thursday April 20, 2006:
DESIDERATA is in a generous mood because the Day of Loving and Gifting is just another 3-1/2 hours away. So he's making the Challengia Easier -- COS Someone has the Audacity to Arsk for IT!
"
Helen
said...

What is H2O?


I no study many séance, I mean sains, I guess hor..
H2O in Engrish is water,
Kantonis is sui,
According to the University of Society (recognized worldwide mia), their definition is substance/lubricant that reduces friction when applied as a surface coating to help reduce difficulty or conflict.

The next Q, is harder. I no engineer, and no idea wat is sideways joint. Since u ask why, I have to conclude it is not the norm lar. If that is the case, my guess is....

**drumroll** Bcos nobody else is doing it?? We can once again go into OHkau records??

(DESI: Nice try, but nice doesn't win a price!
'tis hoRst vely crule one, fligghty oso. Ah Choooo! Too much water in the Straits.)

Dessi, next time Q & A can we have it in objective form??

Helen@6:39 PM


"desiderata said...

Because Mui Mui Helen arsed for IT!

NU'E DEADLINE: 10AM, Friday April 21, 2006 after which RESULTS will be announced -- TOP OF THIS POST. Three winners too.

PICK -- restricted to ONE TRIAL! -- from the following Objective answers to ChallengiA re H2O: (liquid flowing out of the nose)

(1)Code-ine/cough-drop
(2) Phlegm
(3) Halia
(4) Semi-hardened nose discharges


PICK
from the following Objective answers to ChallengiA re Sideaways Joint: (Something to similar meaning would have been acceptable...):

(1)Since two halves do not meet, just continue building and Mal-Sin would have two parallel bridges finally!

(2)Since two halves do not meet, need to build a Perpendicular Joint to link both halves sideways, hence Sideways Joint!

(3)Like Helen, the Coder gives up driving at deadend of nu'e bridge, disrobes, and jumps into the Straits to join up with See Fei coming from the opposite direction who does likewise.

(4)None of the above -- Let's go-stan and consult both Sin- and Mal- Gomen, they know bestA!

Desiderata @8:35 PM

~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ends UPDATE@8.30PM April 20, 2006~~~~~~~~~~~


ORIGINAL POST starts here!


FAIR THEE WELLA WARNIG:
TOO MUHAZARDOUS TO YOUR HELL...LOL!CH CODE-ine MAY BE


Reading again lust night the shortest Post, I believe, at http://fashionasia.blogspot.com, Desiderata was inspired to start Bloggers Very Own Ditties in song, verse or worse, prose, pro or pros, my Esteemed Readers are welcomed to add to what follows: via Comments, and I'd promote to the Friontpage who meet some exacting standrads put forth by this DICKtatorial HoRst!
Kepuptusan Saye adalah Finale dan Murtabak ...ooops, Muktamad! (Jest came from Mamak shop with besta Roti Mubarrak... Remember, Dat SemuaNya Ok kopishoppe I told thee about, in SJ?)


Malaysians have been playing da game of Bridge for days, nay, many weak or mooney?, now. Some have become experts.
I hesittated on SEXperts when my mine was thinking subVERT, but some of my Da Desi Code cuntverts may object lest they deem them less than patriotik to NegaraKu.
Okay, this hoRst today is piggy-back2 on FAshionistA to Da Desi Code, so Be Prepared like a Boy Scout this moUrning. Wednesday's Child is a Childe of Woe. I didn't say so. Big brother Matt Monroe -- wunder if he was cuntverted by Marilyn Monroe.
"I've Been to Paradiso" gal
Gas "She's Not Been to Me", sorry, pal.


~~~~~~~Let's GO&ENJOY FashionistA's ORI
before the Johor Straits waves cover Da Bridge!

~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~
~~~~~
~~~
~

Friday, April 14, 2006
Water Under The Bridge

Is a face a face without a nose?
Is a nose a nose without a bridge?

Water under the bridge so they say.
Bridge? What bridge?

posted by Fashionasia at 5:18 PM | 10 comments

DESIDERATA: FAshionistA asks one Q: What bridge.
DESI's DECODE: That bridge which is common to all of us-lah, connecting the two holes
through which the H2O flows when we sneeze!
More prominent, even crooked?, on Dr Mahathir's than on Pak Lah's... Or even on Desi's or Fashionista's-la-la-la-lah!

Jest for da rekod, I reprise my response to fashionista's tease, a case of I scratch your back, you scartcch my back -- 'Oooch, not so hard polis,' some1 yells. I dunno Dr, Who?:

~~~~~~~"
Fashionasia
said...
my friend my friend.
this blog mayhaps be of interest to u.
http://desiderata2000.blogspot.com/
clue to my puzzled post.
burn the bridges i'd say.

12:55 AM, April 15, 2006


Fashionasia said...

oh and be warned. its rather addictive.... like a good book the desi code is.

12:57 AM, April 15, 2006


desiderata said...

fashionistA:

how much is your CONmiss...?

now you're my PRO ... strictly without the Ass!
serriiouuusssS, wanna S-witch lane, ah? Lois, or Loi, loi loi trnsalted as cCome, come, come ...Fry with me! Chinaman for Superman "fly" since da Bridge that was there had been taken by David Copper to HIS field.:) ENJOY!

"Able was I ere I saw Elba" from a Li'l Napoleon...GalApril 15, 200S'X!

2:00 PM, April 15, 2006


desiderata said...

Congrats Mui Mui:

You're a true cuntvert, cunning and pervert, ooops, i mean subvert.
I'll DHL one kontenaload of Haridas tehtarik. Just don pull my legs too hard -- Napoloen is already to short even on Hi heels!

2:04 PM, April 15, 2006
"~~~~~~~

Some PRomotion, eh?
Anone wants to employ a good marketeer or PR manager? Contact Desi so I can maketh a 30% CONmiss...("Cheong hei wan!", I hear some1 whisper in my era...)



DESI's challengiA riding piggy-back3 on FAshionistA's ORI:
What is the H20?

Di'ty1:

I got fed UP of KL-city
Big, bad wolves and water so shitty


So to sin-land UP-pity I go
On reaching JB it's a tale of woe
I drive up the Scenic Bridge
WoW the sensurrouns are indeed beautifool
The ride smooth and oh so kurl
Then I arrive happily at the midpoint
Where MAL-1/2 and SIN-1/2 are to meet
Our architects and engineers disAPpoint
They are still designing a sideways joint
Now we see why so much money has gone down
With murky waters under Da Bridge



Decode ChallengiA:

~~~~~~~"Why the nedd to have a Desinger to come UP with a
SIDEWAYS JOINT?



PRIZE:
The first THREE all-correct answers to the TWO CHALLENGES will get a PRIZE come Seoptember; Miss Patience is Petite, Virtuous, Wise and whatever...~~~~~~~"


DEADLINE:
Until the sideways joint is ready and Desi can reach dat Restron where mGf See Fei is waiting with his Cilli Craps! Patience, eh?

Dear ER:
Please send me your d'rty ditties on Da Bridge okay? Be creative - lah, Desi has been training you wat! Please Jest don fall into the wat-lah!

PICKUP@10.30AM when I flu to lundun to look at the King--
and detoured to Theels to gift her Haridas' Teh-C, butt she insisted on Howsy's henSIP (for a moment I thought it was henSAP!) cure for her ....(DEsi's blwoing his blardy nose3...Howsy his horn2..)

~~~~~~~~Quarantine Area ~~~~~~~~~
*sneeze!*
~~~~~~~~ end of Q Area~~~~~~~~~~~


*sneeze!*

..and *sneezes* continues.

I need lensip! A nice cup of hot tea too!

Oh no, I ate at Nandos today. Do I need hensip then?

*sneeze again!*

How to study with a nose so blew.
I con't evern spek popeurgee!


posted by Twisted Heels
at 1:18 PM on Apr 18 2006




desiderata
said...

"Theels:

You must have inspired Desi's ride-on piggyback ChallenguiA on FAshionistA's challengia: you MUST try, and that comes from DICKtatorial hoRst at Desi's Place!

Wat's that H2O from below Da BridGe when you SNEEZE so badly I could 'ear you all the way from Malaysia-eh (and you're at Lundun Bridge rite? -- pls NOT Nyet Falling down, Falling down!)
"
3:51 AM
(Lunduners like Theels and Howsy like to use branded Watches like Rock&Rollex and Gucci-Gootchi from Petaling Street. Howsy's patriotick! tock!


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ WATER AT DA sinnis BRIDGE LEVEL~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

ALL COMERS Yesterday, TODIE! and 2MORROW?

UPDATED ON DAYTOO 1100 hours April 20, 2006

Ditty2

Twisted Heels said...

a scenic bridge
a sinking ship
blast the nose
the flow in grip


the submarine
shaking hands
blast the bridge
worth thousands of grand


desi on hi heels
to scenic glee
twisted mind, twisted heels
was it stability
or colonisation of thee?


I blue my nose
say hi n bye
all is well, sail ahoy
desi, do you understand me?


2:34 AM


Thursday 11AM, Desiderata ripostes:

Theels, I understand thee with g'ee
Tosai on paper eyes on mamak mee
The answer to Stanza 1 same as Desi's H2O
So smartONE, what's D'Other Word for
"the flow"?